


Fields of Gold

by RedCatRen



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Betrayal, Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Force Ghosts, Grief/Mourning, Hux is Not Nice, Implied Sexual Content, Jedi Rey, Kylo Ren Redemption, Original Character(s), POV Ben Solo, POV Rey (Star Wars), Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Rey Needs A Hug, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Star Wars: The Last Jedi Spoilers, Virgin Kylo Ren, War
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-28
Updated: 2018-08-27
Packaged: 2019-03-18 01:26:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 34,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13671378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedCatRen/pseuds/RedCatRen
Summary: Six months after the battle at Crait, the First Order has begun to unravel under Kylo Rens leadership. Rey continues to evade his clutches but their bond remains haltingly intact. When Kylo chooses Rey's life over one of his trusted knights, his decision leads to a chain reaction which his treacherous deputy Hux is quick to seize upon.When Poe uncovers a coup in the works , a plan is quickly  hatched to take out both Kylo and Hux out in one fail swoop. In the midst of such chaos and confusion, where the balance of the war remains poised on the head of the needle, can Rey find one last chance to save the soul of Ben Solo before it's too late?Is Kylo Ren too blinded by his own desperation to find Rey not to fall into the Resistances carefully set trap or see the danger that surrounds him in his own inner circle?The balance of the Force and the entire Galaxy depends upon it.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all,  
> This is my first Star Wars #reylo story! It's been rattling around in my head for quite a while since I saw the Last Jedi.  
> I hope you enjoy it. The plot is semi fleshed out and I imagine it to reach 12-14 chapters in all. Things will be a semi slow-burn but I will try balance the action with as much Kylo/Rey/Ben moments as possible.Ratings may be subject to change as chapters may get violent. Please review if you like, Kudos are always welcome to.  
> Much thanks,  
> -RedCatRen
> 
> p.s the First Chapter has been edited into a prologue and chapter 1 as I felt the original format did not work.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo's POV of the last few months after Crait and his thoughts on Rey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Though not essential to the main plot the prologue does paint the overall picture of Kylo's head space in time before they meet again.
> 
> Skip straight to chapter 1 for immediate Reylo

Six months. 

For six months Kylo Ren had searched for Rey across the great expanse of galaxy that lay between them. Even with all the considerable resources he now possessed, finding the tempestuous scavenger was proving to be a frustrating and almost impossible endeavour. Kylo Ren had lost count of the number of times he had come within a hare’s breath of capturing her, delayed intelligence and brutal twists of fate had continuously facilitated her escape. At times he thought she was deliberately taunting him, fully aware of his desperation to separate her from the Resistance and relishing in the chase. 

 

He was certain Rey was deliberately trying to distract him at vital moments to allow the rebel scum to slip through the First Orders fingers, to delay the inevitable crushing blow which would end their fight. Rey eluded him at every opportunity, driving him to the brink of insanity, his sole focus no longer killing the past but on claiming her for the dark side. He would rip apart the whole universe and burn it to ash to end this game of cat and mouse. No mercy, no quarter for those who hid her from him. 

 

Not that Kylo knew what he would do with her once the wily girl had run out of chances with the gods of war. What would he do once he had her in his grasp? Hux would more than likely expect a public execution for her crimes, to make an example of her. Kylo could never allow that, but anything but death would cause inevitable consequences. 

 

The Supreme Leader’s fixation on find the lowly born scavenger had not been lost on General Hux or the rest of the First Order High Command. Their patience and loyalty wearing thin as their leader's cloudy judgement forced them to make tactical mistake after tactical mistake. All agreed strategy and plans were universally overruled in mere seconds to give way to heedless and reactionary orders. The iron fist of Kylo Ren would bend, not listen to reason or consider diplomacy when it came to dissenting voices within his leadership, even at the cost of securing the war. His obstinate nature knew no bounds. 

 

Since the embarrassment at Crait, the balance within galaxy was tipping more and more in the direction of their enemy. Each new minor loss to the Resistance was chipping away at the First Orders dominance, shot by shot, piece by piece, until whole systems turned from red to blue. Hope and defiance in the Galaxy spread like a cancer, killing the First Order from the inside out. There were rumours on some of the smaller vessels in the Outer Rim, the navy was starting to hemorrhage stormtroopers in great numbers, casting aside their armour to align with the rebels. The rumours were bolstered by the traitor FN-2187’s transmissions on the HoloNet, demanding they throw down their weapons and join the light. It was a call to arms the First Order was increasing finding hard to ignore. The reality of the situation was they were sinking under Ren’s leadership. 

 

General Hux knew what had to be done, he knew they had to eliminate the young fool, but he also knew in this he had to be patient. The chance to excise the tumour that was Kylo Ren was drawing near, but he would just have to have wait for the opportune moment to seize it. Just as Kylo had been in killing Snoke. Hux was under no illusions the old demon had met his death at the hands of his apprentice. And so the cycle would repeat itself. All old things would die to make room for progress. 

 

The truth of the matter remained, Kylo Ren had no real affinity for creed General Hux upheld and propagated. The tenets on which Hux wanted the Galaxy to operate held no interest or significance for him. Not anymore. The whole Galaxy would bow to him, but only to help him find Rey of Jakku. She was all that mattered now. 

 

It was the quiet moments in his quarters that Kylo really understood it, the real reason behind his drive to find her. As much as he tried to convince himself it was simply self-preservation, he knew this was just another denial of reality. It was accurate to say he would be stripping the rebels of their most potent weapon and asset. But the truth, he realized, was much harder to swallow. 

 

The was nothing he could do to control the pull he felt towards her, to the light and sense of peace she brought to him. Now in their separation it felt as if he’d lost a limb, this phantom pain of something missing aching dully in his chest. For he knew now what it was to have her, even for the shortest of moments. The sheer power they possessed when working in unison was like a drug to him. Together they had been unstoppable in the throne room, a true balance of furious strength and skill and yet strangely harmonious. It was as if they had always fought alongside one another. Linked by some unfathomable power. 

 

Kylo had been so high on that feeling of connection and kinship with her, he had offered her the entire Galaxy, a gift only his equal would ever be worthy of. His whole body had shaken with anticipation as he had reached his hand out to her, never wanting anything more in his life than for her to join him and save him from the lonely desolation that surrounded him. In those briefs breathes before she had tried to summon the lightsabre, he had seen his own longing mirrored in her eyes. That deeper want inside them that exceeded simple companionship and understanding. If he had been one to hope, he would almost have mistaken it for desire. But alas, Rey was as lost to the light as he was to the dark, torn in separate, irreconcilable directions. Her choice was one he recognised, it was the choice his uncle had made all those years ago too. Tearing his soul in two. 

 

When he had awoken after his grandfather’s lightsabre had fragmented into pieces, he was dejected to see her gone, the ghost of her haunting every inch of the throne room. Kylo’s anger and confusion had gotten the better of him after that, the battle with Luke and failure at Crait a rage induced haze until he’d seen his father’s dice on cavern floor. At that moment, he’d felt that long buried pull of Ben Solo inside him. The pull of grief, loss and regret. The desperate pleas of his mother to come home just one last time. His past would never be killed no matter what he did. And in that moment Ben Solo had felt the unmistakable hum of their force bond bursting open, a bond he thought extinguished when Snoke had fallen. And yet, there she stood hesitating by the door of his father’s ship, a look of yearning but also disappointment etched onto her face. 

Kylo Ren had been struck dumb in her gaze, in awe of the power and light that radiated around her. He’d been a fool to think for one second her could destroy her. He worshiped her. 

Before he’d had a chance to plead her to stay, to beg her for her forgiveness, Rey shut the door on him. Abjectly refusing to let him cloud her thoughts again. He’d felt the snap of the bond shattering as he sensed her force signature move rapidly away into the sky. Rey had made her choice, just as he had. 

 

Even in this heartbreak there lingered an unanswered question that plagued his mind. In the throne room she’d had the chance to kill him while he lay unconscious. To fully end this war before it even really began, but had chosen to grant him his life. He had hoped her reasons were the same as his. That she would never be able to truly ever take the final swing and put an end to it all. Driven by an understanding that something greater was at play. 

 

This was the reason Kylo Ren chased Rey across fire and ice, land and sea until the outer reaches of existence. He needed her in ways he did not fully understand and they were meant to stand together. 

 

It seemed however, Rey was not as willing to cooperate with the will of the Force when it came to their connection as he was. Somehow, she’d found a way to block him out, whether it had been shutting herself off from the Force entirely or some new Jedi mind trick she’d learned by some miracle. Somehow, he guessed it was the second, her mark in the Force growing brighter by the day. Her strength so formidable he could not seem to find a way through. Rey defences built so deeply he could only watch from the outside in desperate isolation. 

 

Kylo had only received flashes of her face since they had parted, like the flickering of a candle in the wind. Moments which at times took his breath away. Her bright smile at some unseen entity in the distance was the one which hit him hardest, he had never earned such a gift from her. The flashes he received became so brief he had come to accept he may never experience her presence again through the bond. Even the shortest of seconds, however, gave him comfort that their bond could not be broken. Her resistance was like trying to hold back the unrelenting tide on the shore, eventually the water would find a way through. 

 

And when that day came, Kylo would be ready.


	2. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo and Rey see each other for the first time in months. Rey is later put in grave danger and Kylo makes a split second decision that causes serious consequences.

It was eight months after the battle at Crait that Rey finally succumbed to the will of the Force. Kylo's presence finally finding a way through.

Their bond ripping open in the middle of the night whilst both were on the edge of sleep. Vulnerable to the impulses that governed their unconscious. Her initial shock at his appearance at the foot of her bed in his night clothes was obvious. Her lips parted, her brow furrowed deeply as a look of panic and surprise crossed her features. Kylo’s own eyes widened as he was struck temporarily dumb, his chest heaving in amazement as he took in her familiar form at the opposite end of his bed. It was clear to him she was resting somewhere on the Millennium Falcon, the narrow bunk visible through the haze that surrounded her. Rey’s eyes blinked rapidly at him as she realised this was no dream, her carefully constructed shields had fallen in a brief moment of weakness. 

Kylo leaned forward to steady his nerves, his dark tunic sticking to chest as he broke into a cold sweat at the sight of her. He was filled by an immediate relief and elation at seeing Rey, which quickly died as her eyes hardened into an obvious scowl. She was not best pleased to see him. Without uttering a single word, Rey pulled the thin bed sheets around her narrow shoulders, her dark expression growing as turned her face away from him. A thrumming animosity rolling from her thoughts into Kylo’s mind. Determined to ignore him until the Force released her to her solitude again. Before he could stop himself, Kylo suddenly found his voice in the vain hope she’d at least look at him before they were torn away again.

“Please, please don’t shut me out.” He whispered desperately, all pretence of anger and betrayal evaporating as his pain and fear spilled out in his plea. 

Kylo had planned many times what he’d say to her when they saw each other again, the vitriol and cruelty he would lash upon her for her soft heart and foolishness. But all these carefully planned insults and manipulations exited his mind as he felt her light surrounding him, drifting across the millions of miles between them. The warm of it melting the icy hatred that engulfed his heart.

Rey’s body stiffened as she recognized the desolation he bled, a pain she herself felt. Her resolve wavered as the intoxicating darkness of his presence ebbed at her consciousness, pulling her gently towards him. Sighing loudly, she turned back to face him, her expression guarded.

“Fine” Rey muttered unhappily sitting up in her narrow bunk “I won’t be able to sleep with your looming presence here anyway.” 

She swore she almost saw a ghost of smile on Kylo’s full mouth as a look of relief washed over his eyes, a flash of Ben shining through as he stared at her.  
“Why have you been avoiding me Rey?” he replied suddenly, the hurt he felt barely below the surface. She rolled her eyes in response, folding her arms across her chest.  
“Do I really need to answer that question Kylo?” Rey sighed in annoyance “Do you not think it has something to do with the fact you keep trying to kill me and my friends?”  
“Unsuccessfully of course” she added scornfully, her eyebrow cocking as shot him an arrogant smirk. Kylo’s eyes narrowed as he clenched his jaw, fully aware she was trying to antagonise him. 

“Be that as it may, you can’t outrun the First Order forever. Death is coming.” He said coldly “Even for you if Hux gets his way” Rey stared back at him impassively.  
“Only if Hux gets his way? What about yours Supreme Leader Kylo Ren? You are the Jedi killer after all” she said bitterly after a moment, calling his bluff. Kylo’s gaze dropped after a beat, not willing to let his uncertainty show.

“You know that’s not what I want. I can only stop that rabid cur Hux if I reach you first Rey.” He sighed softly, a look of pleading in his eyes when he met her gaze again “Please stop running from me, it’s the only way I can protect you”.

“Protect me! You want to enslave me. Use me to destroy those I consider friends” Rey barked back.

“I didn’t offer you the Galaxy to make you my subordinate Rey, I offered you the Galaxy to help me make it better. Fairer.” Kylo exhaled bitterly, his eyes sad.

She regarded him for a moment, there was nothing but honesty in his face. Her death was never something he would get any pleasure from, despite her rejection of him. It was something Rey had never really considered until that moment. Deep within something long forgotten started to ache, the pull towards him growing stronger.  
“You know I can’t do that.” She said sadly, her eyes dropping as she drew her knees in close to her body.

“Stop holding on Rey, you know the Resistance can’t win this war. The wheels of fate are already in motion. We can’t stop them.” Kylo begged, moving towards her across small distance of the bunk. 

“Yes we can Ben. It’s not too late to turn back. Even for you” Rey replied shakily, her face a mask of steely resolve when she looked back at him again.  
She stuck up her chin in defiance, trying to ignore the sudden flash of heat that bristled around them as she became aware of his closeness to her. Kylo’s face now only a few inches from her own. In a different universe maybe, the unspoken desires between them could have been quenched. His eyes dropped to her mouth for a split second before he returned to stare into her unflinching gaze.

“How I wish that were true Rey. But I made my peace with my place in this war a long time ago…I am exactly where I am meant to be” he replied quietly.  
“As am I Kylo” Rey said sadly “So stop chasing me. I am not coming back.”

His temper started to flare as it finally struck him that nothing he could say to her would convince her to stop running. Turning away, he rose to his feet. With aggression building, his hands clenched into fists as his breathing started to get ragged. Her further rejection of his offer enraging him.

“Yes you are Rey, and I will cut down every single one of your so called friends to make sure it happens.” he growled as her looked back at her, his chocolate brown eyes almost black in the gloom of the bedchamber.

“No you won’t” Rey smirked haughtily. Kylo scoffed and strode over to her bedside again.

“Don’t test me Rey. The resistance is dying, you don’t have to die with them” he said fiercely looming over her.  
“I won’t, and you’re wrong. The resistance is growing stronger.” she smiled up at him with confidence. Leaning forward, her smile bordered on arrogant as she tried again to provoke him  
“I know you’ve felt. The light is growing”.  
Kylo scoffed again, but didn’t respond immediately. Oh how he hated her in that moment, because it was true. Despite everything the First Order had done, despite all the atrocities he had committed, the light was finding a way through.

“Not for long! I will crush it out of every corner of the galaxy it dares inhabit, just watch me.” He sneered, leaning down towards her with fiery intensity. Rey’s glared back at him, her tenacity not cracking one bit in the face of his attempted intimidation. 

“Keep telling yourself that Ben Solo and maybe one day you’ll actually believe it.” She spat back.  
Rey could feel his rage building more and more, the frustration at her obvious defiance more than his conflicted soul could take. As soon as she had used his real name, she realised her goading had gone too far.

“I will find you and I will make you suffer until the light is nothing but a distant memory” Kylo growled again, his eyes burning with anger as he leaned down further to be level with her face.  
“You are nothing but a silly little girly no one wanted, you are nobody”.  
Rey breathed in sharply as his words hit their mark. The pain of this insecurity, a wound he could so easily kick.  
Kylo regretted rashness as soon as the words exited his mouth, the sudden look of hurt on her face making remorse surge from his gut. His anger forgotten as he realised his mistake.  
‘Kriff’ he thought internally.  
“ Rey….I…didn’t mean…I ” he stuttered as he tried to muster the right words to apologise. 

It was then that the bond started to fade, her face becoming fainter and fainter in the darkness. That look of pain and anger never leaving her. Kylo became frantic as he reached out to try and touch her before she disappeared.  
“Goodbye Ben” Rey said bitterly, her voice whispering across the closing link. And then he was alone again. 

After she was gone, he’d torn apart his room in a fit of rage, tearing furnishings and walls to shreds as his anger coursed through him. His screams of rage never quelling the storm in his heart. He cursed the Force and Rey for making him feel like this, so unbalanced and out of control. But above all he hated himself for his own folly. He had to find her.  
...................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Many more cycles passed before Kylo saw Rey again, the flickering of their bond that had plagued him before had ceased for weeks. Kylo only knew of her continuing survival through the battle reports Hux insisted on producing. Each one a long list of tactical failures and concessions to the increasingly powerful forces of the Resistance and their allies. Naboo and Mon Cala had already declared its alliance to General Organa and her rag tag group of degenerates, bolstering their fleet of ships almost threefold. Kylo knew Hux considered most of these failures to be his fault and was in no doubt he was secretly baying for his blood to the other in the Order. As of yet the snivelling weasel hadn’t tried anything to usurp his position, but he knew time was running out to prevent his inevitable move against him. 

Yet Kylo's attention remained swayed towards his reluctant combatant. Rey was making quick work of many of the First Orders best fighters and there were talks of sending the Knights of Ren to snuff her out. Thus far, Kylo had managed to convince the admiralty not to sacrifice his warriors just yet. He knew her powers and skills were growing, as were his own since Snoke’s untimely demise. Yet he was not willing to chance her life or his brothers with testing her abilities. He alone would be able to subdue her. 

It was whilst overseeing battle operations on next offensive in the Median system when he heard the tell-tale change of atmosphere and balance. That low variation in pitch which signalled their next meeting through the force. Their bond exploding once more into the present as he was torn from the command deck beside Hux and into the chaos that surrounded her. A low whistle of star ships whirring by growing louder. Breathing in deeply, he searched the room for her face, hoping none of the commanders noticed his abrupt change in demeanor. They already considered him a despot and fool, madness was not something he wanted to add to their long list of complaints. 

Suddenly out of the corner of his eye he caught the blur of her dark grey robes as she ran passed him, newly completed sabre staff held aloft as she roared. He watched her race towards another figure cloaked in a hooded black robe, sparks exploding as her violet blade arced down and hit her opponents blood red counterstrike. Blaster bolts screamed passed his head as he was pulled from the Finaliser’s clinical, metallic deck and into the midst of the battle on Median III, a rocky outcrop in the system they begun attacking. The bellowing of TIE fighters, X wings and Naboo bombers thundered overhead as he watched in awe as squadrons above dove up and down in vicious dogfights. The already dusty orange sky becoming opaquer from the smoke that billowed from falling ships. Fire and cloying, acrid smells of singed metal and earth choking the air around him. Stormtroopers and Resistance infantry forces clashed to his far right, exchanging round after round, blasters straining on both sides as many fell. Neither gaining the upper hand. 

Kylo’s momentary stupor was interrupted as he heard Rey roar again, her blades swinging menacingly as she spun them towards the hooded man in figures of eight. The other fighter parried her swings with relative ease, sending her backwards as he landed a carefully aimed kick to her stomach. Rey hit the rocky ground hard, wheezing as oxygen rushed out of her lungs. She was soon on the move again, rolling quickly away as her opponent tried in vain to strike her on the ground. Her eyes were almost black with fury as she rose, her gritted teeth making her breath almost whistle as she panted against the pain. Kylo recognised the look immediately, it was the same one he’d seen when they’d battled in the snow. Determination, grit and rage channelled into action. Rey was not going to stop now. 

Her violet weapon crackled as she gripped it tighter. Circling the hooded figure like a lioness, she waited for her opportunity. The hooded figure shook off their robe as he raised the scarlet weapon again, adjusting his stance to await the next onslaught. Seeing the dark green mottled skin and amber eyes of the attacker facing Rey, Kylo’s heart stopped. Seeing the long white canine’s bared against feline features, Kylo was no doubt.

‘Malachi’ he gasped, suddenly finding himself rushing forward towards them. His lungs straining as he thundered across the smoke littered battle ground.

Of all the Knights that Kylo Ren had at his disposal, Malachi was the most lethal. Strong, fast and nimble with a lightsabre, he was ruthless in his execution. A master of one on one combat and expert tactician. Rey was in grave danger if her concentration lapsed for one second. Clearly Kylo’s order had not been heeded by Hux regarding the Knights of Ren. The duplicitous General would be duly punished for this insubordination. But first Kylo had to stop this. Leaping over boulders and the loose terrain of the planets barren surface, Kylo raced towards them. All forethought gone as his fear drove him forward. 

Violet and scarlet blades clashed again as both Malachi and Rey jostled for dominance. The sparks from the fiery sabres lighting up the gloomy haze of the battlefield. The larger man pressed down into Rey as their sabres locked, sneering vainly as his greater strength drove her back and down towards the ground. Rey’s face twisted in effort as his blade edged closer to her neck. Her exhausted face bathed in the purple and red light of the fiery weapons. Kylo’s panic rose as he watched in helplessness only a few feet away. 

However, Rey was not without wiles and skill. Shifting her weight to the right unexpectedly and stepping sideways, she freed her staff. Her rapid change of stance making Malachi stumble forward as she swung her sabre upwards to strike a glancing blow to his shoulder. Landing a second more forceful lash to the flesh of his right leg as he twisted to defend himself. Hissing in pain and anger, he made wild swings towards her head which she easily avoided. Striking him again in the shoulder, the wounds mainly superficial but deep enough to weaken the knight further. 

Kylo watched her in awe, her speed and accuracy stirring something akin to pride inside him as he marveled at how her duelling had improved. She was truly beautiful to watch. Only Rey had ever bested him in combat and he could see why now. She was truly unrivalled. His indiscreet admiration broke through into the bond and his presence was finally revealed to the unsuspecting Rey.

So close to ending the deadly duel, Malachi now riddled with pain, Rey’s attention was momentarily caught by Kylo’s awestruck face straight in front of her.  
Her eyes locked with his, her sabre dipping as her mouth dropped open.  
“Ben” she whispered in disbelief. Her concentration rattled by the mere sight of him.

It was all the distraction the beleaguered Malachi needed as he charged again, catching her off guard. Kylo’s eyes widened as he watched it happen in slow motion, utterly powerless as Malachi’s sabre swung downwards. Rey turned back with lightening quick reflexes, but despite her best efforts at countering his attack, one strike found its mark. A great upward arc gouging a line in her cheek. The force of his blow knocking her back and onto the ground. Her head cracking against the shale as she landed face down, utterly dazed and exposed.

Kylo’s own face exploded in pain as he felt the full might of Malachi’s assault. The swipe scorching his face in a thin line of fire like she had not so very long ago. He watched in horror as Rey remained face down in the dirt, her sabre flung too far from the devastating blow to be picked up in time. As Malachi approached to make his final killer strike, Kylo stretched out his hand instinctively, his voice booming across both time and space into Malachi’s mind.

“Stop” he roared fiercely as the Knight’s arm froze in place. Malachi’s eyes narrowing in mistrust as he turned his amber glare in the direction of his master’s voice, seeing nothing but smoke and sky. He struggled against the bind, unable to complete the movement. Kylo held his vice-like grip on Malachi’s arm as he glared back, hoping Rey would stir before his tenuous hold would slip. Kylo Ren had made his choice in that moment, he had chosen her.

Behind them Rey jerked awake and whipped around to regard the scene. Her eyes wide with fear and rage as she looked between Malachi and Kylo. Realisation dawning as she comprehended what Kylo was doing and she acted without another thought. She stretched out her hand to snatch her lightsabre, calling it to her as she ignited it. Swinging at her opponents knees she felled him in an instant, her second strike true and brutal as her blade drove through his chest as he lurched forward.

Malachi’s eyes widened as he glanced towards at Kylo again, betrayal and fear on his face before his eyes glazed over, the light within seeping away. He spluttered weakly as his heart quickly still. A quick and clean death.

Kylo felt the snapping of his connection in the Force as Malachi’s signature disappeared, his old comrade’s breathing stilling into silence. Immense guilt filled him as he watched him fall as Rey drew her blade out.

Rey’s chest rose and fell rapidly with exhaustion and adrenaline, as she collapsed back against the rocky ground, her eyes closing momentarily as tears threatened to fall. Her hand released her sabre as she was overwhelmed with contrasting emotions. She lay further down against the rock, the weight of what she had done pressing upon her. She had always hated the act of taking a life, even when necessary. That closing in of the darkness that resided within her rising and falling like the cresting of a wave against the shore. Rey exhaled loudly as the darkness receded little by little as the Force rebalanced itself with the death of Malachi. Every battle and scar told their own stories of light and dark in the Force. The slash on the right-hand side of her face was a mess of blood and scorched skin, a scar which would add further stories to her struggle to fight the light and dark in herself.

Looking down at her with tumultuous thoughts, Kylo’s guilt and relief rose in equal measure. He mourned Malachi’s sacrifice, but rejoiced in Rey’s survival. The thought of how close he had come to losing her was more than he could take.

Beside her, Rey heard Kylo shift onto his knees, crouching beside her fallen foe.

Looking over Malachi’s lifeless body, a great well of loss overwhelmed him. There in the grey shale of this forsaken planet lay his boyhood companion and brother in arms. Bled out and lifeless by his own intervention. They had been Padawan’s together at Luke's temple all those years ago and he had been one of the first to jump to Ben's defence in the aftermath of Skywalker’s rash attack. Malachi the brave legionnaire of minimal words, but steadfast loyalty. He would have followed Kylo to the depths of hell if he'd asked.  
"I’m sorry" he whispered, laying his hand upon his old friend’s face. Closing his empty eyes with the greatest of reverence, Kylo sighed deeply and clenched his fist in bitter loss. Destruction and desolation was all that met those who cared about him. He had lead Malachi to death and, yet he would make the same choice a million times over to save her.  
Turning his attention to Rey his fingers hovered over the wound on her face as he leaned in closer. An almost replicant of the wound that had scarred his own face, he pondered the quirk of fate that had caused it. 

Rey eyes opened again as she looked at him cautiously, his fingers slowly contracting back to his side with slight embarrassment.  
Looking away and back at the dead Knight, his self-hatred and guilt surged through the cosmos and into Rey as Kylo struggled to contain his own emotions.

Rey sat up abruptly and looked over at him with sudden realisation.  
"He was your friend" she gasped, her own dread rising once more.

"Yes, yes he was " Kylo replied his eyes downcast as his jaw set uncomfortably. Anger starting to swirl around him.

"I'm sorry" Rey said after a moment, knowing words would never suffice in expressing her regret.  
"Don't be" he replied darkly as he rose to his full height again "It was either him or you." 

The unspoken 'and I chose you' hanging in the air uncomfortably as his hard glare softened as he took in her broken form.

"Are you okay?" he added shakily walking closer, his eyes falling on the deep slash that marred her beautiful face. Swearing he would make Hux suffer for causing her harm.

"I'll survive. But I guess we're even now. An eye for an eye as they say" She replied bitterly with a wince.  
The corners of Kylos mouth quirked upwards for a moment despite the seriousness of their surroundings. Reaching down, he offered her his hand to help her up.

"I guess we are" he replied with sullenly sigh, his gaze dark and unreadable.  
Sighing loudly and against her best judgement, she accepted his help and took his gloved hand in hers, his strength easily pulling her to her feet.

Despite the distrust and antagonism that surrounded them and battle that waged on inside their own hearts, neither let go of the others hand. Not a word was spoken as they stared at each other, lost in the heat of the moment. A deep and undeniable pulse of magnetic attraction in the others presence stirring beneath. The pressing pull becoming too much to bear considering the real distance between them. Taking a step forward, Kylo’s heart thrummed in his chest, acting solely on instinct he started to reach his hand again to her cheek. This time making tentative contact to the uninjured side of her face.

“Just because this makes us even, doesn’t mean I’m not sorry he did this. I swear…I didn’t send Malachi” he murmured sincerely, looking deep into her eyes. The darkness receding as they turned a warm chocolate in contrast to her brilliant hazel.

“I know” she whispered back.

Rey made no move to stop him, her eyes softening as she saw his nervousness again. His lip quivered a little as an unguarded surge of longing rolled from him through their bond as his fingers traced her cheek bone gently. The corners of Rey’s mouth quirked into a slight smile as his cheeks pinked a little. The great powerful Supreme Leader Ren, rendered mute and awkward by his own treacherous heart.

Behind them a shout from one of the Resistance fighters interrupted the interlude. The voice familiar and male, the traitor FN-2187 Kylo realised. The boy was calling frantically for Rey, his voice joined by a softer female call.

“I’m down here.” Rey called back, stepping away from Kylo slowly, her eyes never leaving his face.  
“Oh thank the Maker, are you okay?”.

“Yeah, just cuts and bruises” she added blankly, her hand releasing his as her eyes grew sad.

“Good, just stay there” Finn replied with relief, he and Rose arriving over the ridge closest to their plateau “We’re coming down. Poe’s pulling us out”.

Kylo and Rey were thankfully hidden from view by the cliffs rocky overhang, Rey did not want to explain his presence on the battlefield as Rose and Finn approached.

“I’ve got to go” Rey whispered dejectedly, her eyes shining with unspoken regret. Kylo simply nodded, as his gut twisted in disappointment.

“I know” he gulped, his eyes dropping as he tried to hide his feelings. 

Turning to leave, Rey paused for a moment to watch him. He was looking down again at his fallen friend with desolate eyes. Those brown eyes so forlorn and lost that it tugged at her heart. She had caused this.

Breathing deeply and knowing it was a definite mistake, she walked back towards him.  
With a furtive glance to the ridge above and confident Finn was far enough away not see her, she ran back to Kylo with purpose.  
He watched her rapid approach with startled wide eyes. Before he could prepare himself, she blindsided him by launching herself upward and throwing her arms around him. Burying her face in the crook of his neck as he caught her. Rey’s embrace tightening as his own arms wrapped around her in pure impulse, holding her a few inches above the ground. Her weight feeling like almost nothing against him.

It had been many years since anyone had hugged him and it took all his concentration not to stiffen immediately with awkwardness. Her warm body pressed against his, making thoughts and feelings long since forgotten swirl around him in heady confusion.

"Thank you for saving me...and I am sorry. For everything" she whispered earnestly in his ear as she raised her head slightly away from his broad shoulder. Kylo simply held her tighter in response, his head dropping towards her neck, unable to find the words to reply. Taking comfort in the unexpected solace her embrace brought him. 

The force seemed to expand and hum around them as a shared sense of peace and belonging enveloped them, the ebb and flow of dark and light shifting into equilibrium.  
Rey pulled back a little to look at him, her curiosity at this strange new sensation getting the better of her. Their faces so close she could feel his faulting breath hit her flushed skin. Kylo's own brow furrowed in wonder as looked back at her as he felt the same energy run through them both. Not fully understanding the surge of power that coursed through them. Rey opened her mouth to say something and it was then the bond closed. 

Rey all at once stood there on the rocky outcrop alone, his warm dark presence ripped away from her into the ether. Taken aback by the sudden feeling of loneliness that surrounded her without him there. Behind her the footfall of her friend shook her out of her reverie.

“Come on, we need to get out of here. Something bad has happened and Poe told us to get to the Falc…” Rose’s words caught in her throat as she caught sight of Rey’s face. Blood flowing freely from a graze on her forehead, the right side of her cheek a dark red mess.

“Oh my gods Rey, what happened?” she exclaimed having never seen her friend so badly injured.

 

“It’s nothing, I’ll be fine.” Rey answered distractedly. Feeling unstable suddenly without Kylo’s intoxicating darkness beside her.

“Are you sure” Rose said with added concern, her eyes drawn to the prone figure on the ground beside them.

“Yes…I’m fine. Where’s Finn?” she said blankly, staring off toward the cliff face.

“He was having trouble climbing down, a blaster shot grazed his thigh earlier and it’s bleeding quite badly. I left him near the top. He’s safely hidden” Rose replied, pointing in the direction of Finn’s location.

Rey nodded without another word, looking back over the aftermath of her battle. The TIE fighters and X wings still screamed overhead as she was overwhelmed all at once at how close she’d come to death. The battle was still raging all around her and there would be no victor today. Reaching down and grabbing Malachi’s discarded light sabre, she started towards the grey wall of the cliff. Silently hoping whatever trouble that awaited them at the top was simply an exaggeration on Poe’s part.

“Let’s go. I can’t stay here any longer” she sighed unhappily.

Finally reaching the Falcon amid the sudden rush of retreating Resistance fighters, Rey’s heart sank. Her chest heaving as a sob wracked her tired body. There, in the valley between two imposing pillars of grey stone, lay the smouldering wreck of a resistance transporter. What few survivors they had found now clearly walking the precarious line between life and death, sheets covering the dozens more that had perished. The destroyed ship was a familiar one, a ship which Rey knew very well. It was Leia’s transporter.  
“No” she gasped in despair.  
...................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

“What in the world do you think you are doing Ren?” Hux seethed audibly behind him “Have you gone entirely insane?”  
Kylo jerked in surprise at the noise, his eyes wide as he found himself in the middle of the Finaliser’s large aircraft hangar. All traces of Rey gone as the bond had snapped shut. The warmth of the battle receding as the clinical sheen of the First Order ship resonated coldly.

“What happened?” he exclaimed in response, utterly bewildered as to how he’d gotten here

“What happened?!” Hux repeated with incredulity, a sneer replacing his usual sycophantic smirk.

“You bolted upright in the middle of our battle manoeuvres, vaulted over the weapons console, mumbling to yourself in front of the entire high command and then ran down here like a man possessed. That’s what happened Supreme Leader” Hux spat back.  
His embarrassment at Kylo’s behaviour enraging him. To his credit, Kylo had the decency to blush for a moment.

“I felt a disturbance in the force, the girl…” Kylo began, clutching for an explanation.

“The girl will no longer be a concern for very long. I’ve made sure of that this time” Hux smiled smugly.

Kylo’s head snapped up in rage as he sensed Hux’s arrogance and delight in his deception. Raising his hand, he pulled the General towards him, launching him up into the air. The red-haired trouble maker kicked his legs aimlessly in panic as Kylo’s grip tightened on his throat.

“If you mean Malachi down on Median III, you are gravely mistaken. He’s dead” Kylo snarled as his eyes darkened into black pin-points. 

“Supreme Leader, that’s not possible. “Hux spluttered as he struggled to speak, his face the colour of puce as his oxygen decreased. Kylo could feel his thoughts race as he tried to understand how Kylo knew about him deploying the Knight.

“Oh it’s very possible and I should kill you right now for your disobedience. But a rabid cur like you still has his uses” Kylo growled, tossing him aside into the wall of the hangar.  
“Do not disobey my orders again General, do you understand me. Now finish this battle and win us some territory” he said coldly, as he turned to leave the hangar.  
“Yes Supreme Leader” Hux wheezed as the air rushed back into his lungs. His rage and embarrassment suppressed deep within him. Adding fuel to fire to what was his plan of revenge.

As Kylo marched back to his chambers in a foul temper, he was interrupted by the timid clearing of Lieutenant Mitaka’s throat behind him.  
“What?!” he huffed angrily, not even bothering to turn to the meek officer.

“Some news from Median III Supreme Leader, it seems we have we have received confirmation on the status of the transporter Admiral Novo shot down. It was General Organa’s” He paused as he watched Kylo’s posture stiffen.  
“Yes go on” Kylo retorted, his throat tight all at once.

“Survivors are estimated to be less than half a dozen. We cannot confirm at this time if Organa was one of the fatalities” Mitaka added plainly.

Kylo’s shoulders hunched as he absorbed the information, his gut twisting again as bile rose up in his throat. 

“Very well, keep me posted” he replied as evenly as he could manage, blinking back a tear as he continued his march to his chambers. His hands already clenching into tight fists before the doors closed behind him. His control in pieces as he pummelled the walls until his knuckles bled crimson. 

The battle waged on for several more hours and for first time in many months, the Resistance had been pushed back momentarily into hiding. Their new fleet scattering in many directions to the far-flung corners of the Galaxy the First Order did not dare venture. It should have been a moment of satisfaction for the prideful General, but several hours later Hux sat on the bridge, still foaming at the mouth after Ren’s latest assault upon him. Wracking his brain for an answer, for a plan, for an opportunity to remove the interloper once and for all from the throne. Despite Hux’s enviable skills in battle tactics and underhand strategy, he could not see a weak point he could exploit with Ren. For one Kylo had been able to tell Hux of Malachi’s demise over half an hour before anyone in the First Order knew. He seemed omnipotent and unbeatable at this point. Hux’s disheartened musings at that moment were fortuitously interrupted by the interference of a newly promoted surveillance officer.

“Sir, I think you should look at this.” Lieutenant Marks said suddenly “Something strange is happening with the holo feed”.

Hux frowned but approached him, glad to have a distraction from the mundanity that was post battle reporting. 

“What sort of strange happening Lieutenant?.” He asked haughtily, his nose turned up as he reached the officers station. Handing over his datapad the younger man pointed at the screen.  
“You see, I was looking over the duel between the Knight and the little Jedi and well….I noticed something strange.” Marks said gravely.

Playing the surveillance video taken from Admiral Novo’s star destroyer he pointed at Malachi’s apparent pause as he went to strike Rey. His arm jerking back as if tied in a binder, a struggle to release his arm clear on his face. Hux regarded it for a moment, shooting the officer a look of mild disinterest. 

“Probably just a simple Jedi mind trick, that girl is known to be particularly crafty” he sighed in boredom.

“I thought that too sir, but then I saw this” Marks said earnestly, skipping the video along. Hux interested piqued as he saw the girl speaking apparently to thin air. His eyes widening as he watched the unmistakable figure of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren appear as she reached up to embrace him. The hug deepened as Kylo pulled her closer. The gesture nothing someone would confuse with anything but affection. He could practically sense Ren’s infatuation with the girl, the thick-headed fool. Falling for the enemy was something Hux thought so stupid, he had never considered Kylo even capable of such foolishness until this point. The Jedi Killer in love with the very last Jedi in the Galaxy. The Supreme Leader knew no bounds when it came to ineptitude. 

Hux’s haughty expression twisted into a cunning smile.

“Oh I’ve got you now Ren” he muttered to himself, a weakness in his leaders armour finally appearing.

“Very good Marks, I want you to send me that video immediately. Encode the master copy to my personal access codes once completed and tell no one of this. Understand?” Hux said urgently, striding away to start planning his next move.

“Yes sir” the Lieutenant replied, turning back to his station without another look.

Hux’s mood rose considerably as he reached his private quarters, a smile ghosting his thin lips.  
Kylo Ren’s days were numbered.


	3. Chapter 2

The mood was dour as the Falcon hurtled through lightspeed. 

All aboard the dog-eared freighter sat in silent contemplation. There was nothing they could say that would lift the oppressive gloom that surrounded their journey to the Outer Rim. Apprehension and a shared sense of foreboding overwhelmed them as Leia’s life remained in the balance. The destruction of the transporter had been almost total, the survivors few and their chances slim. Poe had not been in contact since the Resistance had launched from the Median system, a radio silence had been enforced to reduce the chance of message interception. The First Order could not know yet of the crushing blow Leia’s condition would bring to the Galaxy. Any sign of weakness would be pounced upon.

Hyperspace tracking was still a concern for the Resistance, but with a greater fleet and virtual dominance in this part of the Galaxy, the journey to their current base would carry on unimpeded. The last update the Falcon had received was the short, emotion laden sentence of “She’s holding on” from Lieutenant Connix. Since then the desolate silence had stretched on almost endlessly.

Rey sat behind Chewbacca staring off emptily as the bright light of hyperspace rushed passed the cockpit. She did not dare take the place to Chewies left. The Captains seat stayed cold and empty, haunted by Han’s ghost even after the many months that had passed since his death. Rey felt there remained an unspoken agreement between them that the seat would stay absent for the foreseeable future. 

Further into the freighter Finn and Rose sat side by side, their own exhaustion taking hold. Finn’s head began to loll against his chest as he fell into a dreamless sleep, the blood loss and adrenaline rush of the battle taking its toll. Rose stared straight ahead, her hand entwined with his as her gaze fixed upon empty space. Her own worry and fatigue etched into her soft features, fighting against the urge to sleep as they hurtled onwards. Sighing in resignation she leaned her head against Finn’s broad shoulder and let her tiredness overcome her. Finn’s face softened in his sleep as he felt Rose come closer, resting his head against hers instinctively.

Rey stole sly glances back towards them as they huddled closer, a feeling of sadness and jealousy blindsiding her. It was their easy comfort in one another and small gestures of affection that bothered her most, once more reminding her of what she did not have. 

Who she may never have.   
Not if things continued as they did.

Chewies soft growl broke her out of her reverie. Their acceleration slowed as the rush of hyperspace steadily disappeared and the dark shadow of deep space filled the cockpit. The Resistance base now less than a half hour flight from their current position. Chewie gestured to her cheek as he chirruped again, concern obvious in his kind eyes. Though the bacta patch covered most of the offending wound that marred her face, Rey could feel the grimy sheen of sweat and blood covering her neck and hair. She must have looked worse than a wayward nerfherder in this state. Rey could not wait to rinse it all away in the fresher, to be clean again. To cleanse herself in some small way for the life she’d taken. But guilt was not something that washed away so easily.

“I’m fine, Chewie. Nothing but a scratch really “she replied gently.   
Rey knew her hirsute friend was not asking about her face alone, but now was not the time to talk about it. Chewie grunted in disagreement at her answer ,but turned back to the control panel without further comment. 

It was not long before the green and blue sphere of Dalkar grew closer and they started their descent towards home. The geography of the planet was not unlike Takodana with is shades of vibrant green and depthless blue. To this day it still took Rey’s breath away as they soared over fields of green pastures and lakes of crystal waterat . It beggared belief that the First Order had not claimed this pastural oasis before the rebels, but Rey was thankful everyday it had lain untouched until Leia’s scouts had happened upon it many moons ago. It was the closest she had come to feeling belonging in a very long time.

As they reached the ground, the hidden entrance to the hangar opened into a deep cavern to allow the Millennium Falcon to descent into the base. Most of the H.Q. lay under the ground, safe from overly inquisitive First Order scouts scouring the galaxy for their operations. A vast network of tunnels made use of the planets natural cave systems, making the base a veritable labyrinth of activity. The sheer size of which hid the true might of the reborn rebellion. Thousands of fighters and First Order defectors lived deep in the safe confines of Dalkar’s subterranean caves.

A small delegation waited at the main hangar doors for the Falcons arrival, a delegation that seemed incomplete without Leia’s presence.  
Poe’s face was sombre as he approached the Falcon. The once Commander, now acting Fleet Admiral helped usher the limping Finn off the gangway as Rose and Rey struggled to get him towards the medics.

“The bacta patch has been just about holding, but I think he way have a torn ligament….or maybe a tendon. I can never really tell the difference…but I know he’s definitely in pain, so be careful…” Rose said hurriedly to the doctors, as she followed them out to the medbay.   
Poe stalled a minute to watch them leave, shaking his head with a wry smile.  
“That girl is so smitten it’s ridiculous”.   
His smile faltered as he looked over to Rey, finally taking stock of her appearance. Rey did not notice his concern; her eyes were searching the hangar for Leia’s medical transport or any sign of the General’s current condition.  
“God’s Rey what happened to you!?” Poe said with shock, tipping her chin up gently to look at the wound more closely. Feeling a little uncomfortable at his proximity, she turned her face away.

“I ran into one of Kylo Ren’s friends, it didn’t end well.” She answered sourly.   
“Where’s Leia?” Rey added with trepidation. Poe sighed deeply, his face troubled once more.

“She’s in the medbay. We’ve done all we can right now. She’s alive, but only just.”

Rey nodded, biting her lip as she exhaled deeply. Tears threatening to fall.  
“Come on, let’s get that cheek stitched up and I’ll bring you to her.”  
Poe said gently as reached out his hand to her. Against her better judgement she took it, allowing him to lead the way.

Despite Leia’s state, Rey’s thoughts had turned to Kylo not long after the medroids had started their work to piece her torn cheek back together. The stinging pain of the stitches making her appreciate what she had done to him all those months ago, the agony she had inflicted. It was a wound he would carry forever, a reminder of her he would carry forever. And now she would have one to match. They would never be able to forget. Two sides of the same coin, eternally being pulled in opposite directions whilst always being connected. As Snoke had told them, she was the light rising to meet his darkness. Destined to be in conflict. However, the recent memory of their brief embrace on Median III and that rush of something powerful vibrating through them, convinced her that this would not always be the case. They were both a part of something bigger. Something cosmic and unexplained.

One day, the future she saw would come true. She would bet he life on it.

Her thoughts remained with Kylo Ren as she approached Leia’s bed. The medics had deemed her too frail to move into a full bacta tank, her condition too precarious to chance with removing her from the bacta suit. It was then that Rey understood the full magnitude of Leia’s injuries. This was not something she would recover from. She was dying. And Ben would never see her again.

Turning to Poe, her anger rising suddenly as her emotions overtook her.

“Why did you let her get so close to the battle? Why did you let her take that chance?” hot tears of hopelessness pricking at her eyes.

“I tried, believe me I did.” He replied sadly “But the General was never someone to hide behind her troops. Leia always led from the front.”  
“We could have done more, given her more protection.” Rey wept in response, her tears freely flowing now. Hating that her foster mother was being referred to in the past tense already. Poe shushed her as he pulled into a hug.

“There is nothing any of us could have done.” He replied desperately, his own emotions getting the better of him. Rey clung to him, as an overwhelming feeling of loss rolled through her. The balance of the force being churned up by the grief of everyone on the base. Rey could feel it, the darkness encroaching on the hope that had driven the Resistance forward. The mind and heart of everyone on the base broken by the impending loss of another Skywalker.

“She’s still clinging on, maybe just maybe she’ll be strong enough to pull through one last time” Poe whispered hopefully, but Rey could hear he didn’t truly believe it.

In his mind Rey could see the scene replaying over and over, the line X-Wings falling away from Leia’s transporter, the TIE fighters bursting through their defences. Poe screaming in his own ship as he watched the transporter’s last engine explode and the ship fall slowly into the cavern below. He blamed himself for everything.  
Rey hugged him tighter, hoping to relieve his guilt in some small way. 

She was caught off guard as air around them changed all at once and Rey heard the familiar hum of Kylo’s approaching presence. The bond opening once more in the least convenient of times. Rey released Poe immediately, not wanting to deal with the almost certain tantrum Kylo would throw if he saw them. 

Thankfully he stood with his back to her, his shoulders were hunched, and head was in his hands. Kylo had not realised yet she was there. Rey thanked the God’s for this small miracle.

“Poe, do you think you could give me a minute with Leia….in private” Rey said blankly, her brow furrowing as she tried to ignore the obvious stiffening of Kylo’s back when he heard her. Whipping around with wild eyes, his mouth fell open as he realized he was no longer alone. Poe looked at her carefully, his own brow darkening at her sudden change in demeanor. 

“Sure, I’ll be right outside” he said quietly, squeezing her hand affectionately before leaving the room.

Rey’s face remained impassive as Kylo rose from his chair and took a step towards her. She tried not to react as she saw his bloodied and bruise fists clenched by his sides, the gashes barely healing and weeping onto the floor. His chest was heaving, his eyes wide, wild and bloodshot. He knew. There was no doubt. He knew what had happened to his mother.

“Are you happy now?” Rey snarled stalking toward him, teeth clenched as her tears continued to fall “Are you glad to be almost rid of your family?”.

Kylo’s eyes softened as the wild look melted into anguish as looked down at her.

“No, I’m not.” He answered softly.

“Then why Ben, why did you allow this to happen?” Rey spat out, shoving him hard. Unable to contain the anger she felt at that moment. He stepped back slightly at the blow, making no move to retaliate in anyway.

“And don’t you dare tell me to let the past die, don’t be so blinded by your own pride as to utter those words again!” Rey shouted, her anger boiling over once more.

Kylo couldn’t look at her, the dark circles under his eyes magnifying his obvious grief. The red around the depthless brown revealing the hours he’d wept alone. He couldn’t answer Rey, he didn’t know why. Instead when he looked at her again he asked the only question he wanted answer to.

“Where is she? I can’t….I can’t find her anywhere in the force….she’s…she’s ” Kylo mumbled desperately, unable to finish his sentence. Rey’s glistening tears telling him all he needed to know.

It was then Rey realised Kylo couldn’t see the medical bay. Once more the force had only allowed him to see what it wanted. He could see only her. Rey would have to be the one to make the choice to show him what his actions had done.

“Leia’s dying Ben. She’s still holding on, but she’s fading” Rey said simply, her anger abating a little. Kylo’s eyes closed as he exhaled loudly, a pained breath wracking his chest. His jaw and fists clenched tightly as he fought back the tears in his eyes.

“How long?” He asked softly, his chest tight as he gulped back the overwhelming sense of loss that welled up in him. 

Rey’s fury at him all but left her mind as she watched him struggle to stay composed. How could the fire of her rage keep burning when he hated himself more than she ever could?

The muscles in his jaw contracted as he looked away again, swallowing an unseen obstruction, his lip trembled in response. His sorrow and hers rolled down the bond becoming one. Rey could feel his every sadness and regret. Kylo’s brow was furrowed and his eyes desolate as he looked down at Rey again, silently begging for her reply.

“I don’t know Ben” Rey answered honestly, her voice soft and dejected. 

He nodded in response before turning and throwing his fist into the unforgiving steel of his chamber wall. He hit it again as a scream escaped him.  
“Why won’t the Force let me see her? Why did it let me help you kill Malachi, but not see my own mother! Why!” he roared, throwing a nearby chair into the dark depths of his chamber.  
Rey knew the display should have struck fear into her, make her resent Kylo more. But it only made her feel the opposite, she felt compassion.   
There was no indecision in Rey’s mind as she approached him, crossing into the darkness for a moment.

“There is a way, to see her” she said gently, reaching out her hand to him.  
“I’ll help you.” She added looking deep into his forlorn eyes.

Kylo’s gaze narrowed in distrust for a moment, his eyes fixed on her extended hand. The gesture so cruelly akin to the offer he’d made many cycles ago. Her hand did not waver or show any signs of pulling back. His eyes flicked back up to hers, his chest heaving with pent up emotions. Rey could feel his puzzlement at her offer, despite this he raised his own blooded hand and took hers without another word.

She tried not to gasp as a shiver of electricity jumped between them as his finger enclosed over her palm, a crackling once more of something deeper rumbling across the galaxy. Rey couldn’t help but notice how small her hand looked in his, fitting perfectly together like a lock and key. His warm but bloodied hand oddly comforting despite its beaten appearance. The feeling of his hand in hers a welcome solace in all the chaos that surrounded her. A look of surprise ghosted across Kylo’s features for a moment as he felt Rey’s unguarded pondering bleed through. Feeling her face flush at the realisation and pushing these errant thoughts aside, she gently led him back towards Leia in the brightly lit medical bay. 

Finally breaking eye contact with Kylo as they reached the bacta suit, Rey reached out with her other hand to touch Leia’s. Closing her eyes, she focused her mind as much as possible feeling Kylo’s increasing confusion as he watched her. His bewilderment did not last long as he began to see what Rey was doing.   
Blue light started to flood the space behind Rey in Kylo’s dark bed chamber, falling like dust streaming through the bright rays of sunlight. It slowly settled downward into a shape, illuminating the projected image below. The blue cover increasing as Rey focused harder, more and more streaming lines animating the body beneath until Leia’s form glowed in the dark. 

“Mother” Kylo gasped stepping forward, not quite believing what was happening in front of him. His large hand gripped Rey’s harder as he fell onto his knees beside the hospital bed. His tear began again as his gaze roved over her motionless body. The projection not losing one bit of the detail. Deep cuts covering her head and bruises blooming on her exposed arms. He saw now all was lost.

“I’m sorry.” he whispered, his deep voice trembling as choked back a sob as he reached to touch her face with his hand. Stopping just short, he seemed to jolt himself upward, his hand retracting rapidly as if burned.

“I can’t be here.” He said suddenly, pulling back and away from the medical bay. Leia’s image disappeared as he jostled Rey forward accidently, the connection broken as her eyes flew open. Yet still he did not let go of her hand. Unwilling to leave the safe confines of their connection.  
“Promise me you’ll take care of her…for as long as she…” Kylo began.

“Of course” Rey answered with sincerity, not wanting him to finish that sentence. Knowing it would make things all the more real if he did.

They stood there in silence for a moment, utterly unsure of what else to say when there was so much to say to one another. After a beat, Kylo cleared his throat and reluctantly released Rey’s delicate hand.

Just as he was about to offer his begrudging thanks, Rose’s yelp of surprise caused Rey and Kylo to jump, their heads turning quickly to the startled mechanic.

“What the hell is he doing here?” she exclaimed, pointing at Kylo with wide terrified eyes. 

Her shock increased tenfold when she looked back and found him gone.

“Quick Rey, we need to tell Poe he’s here. We need to get this place on lockdown.” She cried in panic, grabbing her friends hand and attempting to pull her towards the door.

Raising her commlink to her mouth, Rose was about to signal for help when the communicator was snatched out of her hand and flew into Rey’s.

“Wait Rose! We don’t have to scare everyone just yet.” she said as calmly as she could.

“Rey are you crazy, I just saw the Supreme Leader of the First Order in here with you and now he’s gone. And you’re telling me people shouldn’t be afraid!” Rose spluttered, her kind eyes filled with terror.

“He’s a mass murderer Rey, the First Order is probably on it’s way now to blow this planet into dust. We need to act now!”. 

Racing towards the door, she found her feet suddenly unable to move. Turning her head to look back at Rey, she found her friend’s hand outstretched, holding her in place.

“Rey, what are you doing?” Rose exclaimed again.

“I swear on my life and the Force we are not in any immediate danger. They are not coming….yet anyway” Rey said evenly, slowly releasing Rose from her hold.

“I have something I need to tell you, but you have to promise not to tell anyone else.”

Rose’s eyes widened again but she stepped away from the door.

 

“Okay I promise, but you better start explaining fast” she replied seriously.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

General Armitage Hux had never felt comfortable around the Knights of Ren. In all the years he served Snoke, not once had he felt at ease in the company of the elite fighters. Despite his high position and close relationship with Supreme Leader Snoke, their presence had always set him on edge. Perhaps it was the fact they all had varying degree of force abilities or that each one of the Knights possessed hand to hand combat skills that vastly outstripped his own. Maybe it was that each member was undeniably physically imposing. Each of the five remaining Knights stood at over 6-foot-tall and with the honed physiques of fighters that dwarfed Hux’s own in terms of bodily presence, they were a group that exuded power and demanded respect. 

What triggered his uneasiness with the Knights most of all, was their unwavering fealty to their Master, despite his glaring incompetence as a leader. They would follow Kylo Ren through the fires of Mustafar and back again if he willed it. They were loyal until the death it seemed. To guarantee his own success in removing Ren, Hux would first have to break their alliance in most direct way possible. If not, he would not keep his life for long. Thankfully for the General, he’d finally found the very poison to pour in their ears and kill Kylo Ren.

The Supreme Leader had not left his chambers in several days since the assault on Median III, with strict orders he was not to be disturbed under any circumstance. Not even his trusted comrades had been allowed an audience in days. Such orders for once did not hinder Hux one bit as he plotted his next move, it was fortuitous indeed as he set his plans into motion. 

Hux tried to steady his breath in the conference room as he awaited the arrival of the Knights of Ren. Despite his confidence in swaying them, he was apprehensive. They had been summoned less than a standard cycle before, from a reconnaissance mission in a close by system. Their arrival would be imminent, he was sure of it. He had not long to settle his nerves and do what needed to be done. True to his assertions, the door opened with a tell-tale hiss as the masked Knights of Ren filed into the room. Headed, as he expected, by Kylo’s deputy Kali, sister of the fallen Malachai. She, and the four Knights that flanked either side, stopped and looked around the room curiously. Searching out their absent master.

“Where is Master Ren?” Kali’s cold metallic voice enquired after a moment of stifling silence, her suspicions of this meeting evident in her tone.

“The Supreme Leader is currently indisposed and has requested not to be bothered until such time he chooses to have company.” Hux said smoothly, a smirk upon his pale lips.

Kali turned her head to look at her comrades for a moment, their dark metallic helmets twisting under the low, bluish light in the conference room.

“Then why did he summon us?” the deep voice of Eshu boomed across the room. The largest of the Knights, he cast an impressive shadow even in this dark space. His simple black helmet adding further menace to his already intimidating form. 

Rising from his chair at the head of the table, Hux stood as straight as possible, his hands behind his back.

“He didn’t, I did.” He said simply.

Kali’s head tilted to the side as she took in his words. He was sure underneath the featureless mask her yellow eyes had narrowed in displeasure.

“We do not answer to you General Hux, you dare disturb us on our mission for Master Ren?.” she hissed in anger taking a small step forward.

“Yes, I do dare. Because we have much to discuss.” Hux replied as decisively as he could muster.

“You wish you discuss to something without the Supreme Leader present?” Morana exclaimed, clearly suspicious of the situation.

Turning to her, Hux nodded, his expression becoming bored. He had anticipated their reservations in speaking with him, but this was becoming tedious.

“Yes. And it is gravely important. It’s about Malachai, so please, sit” he said firmly, gesturing towards the empty chairs around the round table. He returned to his originally seat and placed his hands upon the table without another word.

None of them moved an inch for a moment before Kali let out a long sigh of resignation, curiosity getting the best of her. Reaching up to press the release on her helmet, there was a soft hiss as she removed it.

“Very well, talk then. But make it quick” she growled, her golden eyes fixed upon Hux’s face and canine’s bared in warning.

Following her lead, the others removed their helmets too to glare at Hux in discontent. Without another word, each took a seat at the table. Eshu and Azrael to the left, Morana and Whiro to the right. Kali sat in the middle directly opposite Hux, her intense glare not lessening one bit.

Taking a deep breath, Armitage Hux got ready to deliver the speech that would either lead to his salvation or his immediate death. Words carefully chosen and rehearsed, he began to let the truth flow free.

“First, Kali, may I express my deepest sympathies for the loss of your brother Malachai…he was a brave and nobl…”

The slamming of the Knight’s fist on the table echoed through the chamber as Kali scowled at him further.

“Do not dare to speak to me about my brother Armitage, I know it was you that sent him to Median III to gut that little rebel scum”

“Yes I did m’lady, but he did so to honour your Master Kylo Ren. He acted out of duty” Hux said simply.

Kali scoffed but did not add more, her arms crossed across her chest cantankerously. He had died a noble death at least.

“Just say what you need to say, sycophancy will not aid your cause here.” Azrael muttered with a shake of his head.

“I simply say it so as to remind you of the sacrifice Malachai made for our Supreme Leader, and how misguided that was” Hux said coldly, pressing a button on the datapad in his hand.   
Kali’s immediate instinct to pounce on him was intercepted by Eshu’s large, muscular arm blocking her path, holding her back. He instead pointed up into the holovid that was now playing in the centre of the table.

It was the surveillance tape of the duel between Rey and Malachai, their forms twisting across the dark wood of the table top.

Kali’s rage filled eyes, widened into shock as she watched her own brother’s execution at the hands of Rey. Unable to stop the gasp of realisation as she saw Malachai’s arm stop mid strike despite Rey’s clear state of powerlessness.

“Someone stopped him. He had that little bitch ready to slaughter and someone helped her” She cried in rage, fiery yellow eyes meeting Hux’s arrogant smirk.

“Who did this?” she roared, watching Malachai fall into Rey’s blade despite the pain it caused her.

“Keep watching. The answer you seek will soon appear” Hux replied haughtily, skipping the surveillance video forward until he met the perfect moment.

All four of the remaining Knights of Ren jumped to their feet and leaned forward to watch the holo closer as they saw Rey embrace a figure they recognized immediately, the Supreme Leader, Kylo Ren.

“No it cannot be!” Whiro bellowed in disbelief “this must be a trick!”

“Oh how I wish it was, but when I checked the surveillance here on this ship, something interesting came up in the main hangar”.

The holovid switched to another feed, this time showing Kylo in the middle of the hangar alone. He seemed to bellow a familiar name, his arm out stretched.   
Kali collapsed onto her knees as the full force of his betrayal hit her, immediately recognising her brothers name on Kylo’s lips. What little she had left of her black heart shattering into dust at this treachery. As with the holo of the battle, Rey appeared out of thin air a few moments later as Kylo bent to embrace her.

“Tell me, is this how you greet the person who just killed your oldest friend, is this how you greet the person you claim cut down your Master. " Hux said callously, feeling a twisted pleasure as he took in the deflated and dazed faces that surrounded him. His plan was working.

“I think not.” He added sourly, the hint of a smirk on his face again, pausing of the image of Rey and Kylo gazing at one another as they embraced. The Knights of Ren remained silent as the absorbed the shock what they had seen.

“It is clear that Kylo Ren has been compromised, acting under the influence of this filthy scavenger’s spell. Seduced into betraying the very things he stands for by the Resistance’s little poster girl. Maybe even passing them secrets that have led to many more deaths!”

“We cannot know this for certain!” Morana gritted out, her blue eyes wild and desperate. Trying to cling to her last remaining shred of loyalty to Kylo.

“Oh please Morana” Kali roared, pointing at the image in front of them “Look at what he did. It’s clear as day. Hux is right.”

Her feline features twisted into a menacing snarl she looked at the footage again.

“Who really instigated the attack in the Throne room, she couldn’t do that alone” she added quietly.

“She couldn’t kill Malachai alone” Morana added bitterly, finally admitting the truth that was in front of her.

Kali’s jaw twitched as grabbed her helmet suddenly, her unlit sabre clenched in her hand.

“Wait Kali, now is not the time to strike” Hux said sharply, making her pause by the hydraulic doors.

He suddenly found himself pinned to the opposite wall as Kali reached her hand out in rage. Thankfully she had chosen not to throttle him as well.

“Please do not presume to order me General Hux, Kylo Ren should die tonight for his deceit”

Hux looked at her as persuasively as possible, hoping to convince her before she acted rashly.

“Even if you were to try to do that, he’d sense your rage before you’d even reached the elevator. He’d either kill you or escape before you have the chance to reach him. Furthermore, you’ll never get the Jedi without him. She’s far too clever for that.”

Kali’s grip relaxed somewhat as she took in what he said, knowing it to be right. Hux slowly returned to the floor, a sigh of relief exiting his lungs.

“What would you have me do then, he deserves to suffer.” Kali growled, the other Knights nodded in agreement.

“And he will, but you need to be patient. Shield your minds to him as I do. Wait until they make a mistake and….. kill two bird with one stone so to speak. Draw Rey of Jakku out into the open and Kylo is sure to follow like a puppy.” Hux smiled arrogantly.

“And then?” Azrael asked with barely contained rage.

“When the times right, you can bring me back their heads if you want” Hux smiled with sick enjoyment.

Kali’s dark features slowly shifted into twisted grin, eyes blazing again with malicious intent.  
“With pleasure, my General” she purred, bowing her head in a rare mark of respect. Armitage Hux’s chest swelled as he relished in his success.  
“Excellent! Well we better start planning then” he smiled again.


	4. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tensions rise as plans begin to take shape. Kylo's fate becomes more complicated as Rey place within the Resistance is questioned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The plot is really starting to ramp up and a lot of action is to follow! Hints of Damerey and Reylo, the next chapter will be Reylo heavy and should be up this week as it's almost done.

It had been a further three-day cycles since their initial meeting before Kali's impatience got the better of her. Hux had been true to his word thus far in relation to the Supreme Leaders removal, however things were not moving as quickly as she had envisioned. Kali had barely seen the wily General since he had revealed Kylo’s betrayal and in the meantime the Supreme Leader had finally extracted himself from his self-imposed exile. Staying neutral in front of the traitor was draining to say the least, her anger raged hotter and hotter like the Jakku sun under her mask of indifferent obedience. Further frustration grew from the fact the Resistance had been irritatingly quiet since the battle in the Median System, rumours persisted this was due in part to Leia Organa’s imminent death. Not that Kali cared in any small way for the grief this would cause her enemy. Vengeance and swift justice was all that mattered. Rey of Jakku remained elusive and as such Kylo Ren remained untouched.

Finally reaching the end of her tether with her reluctant accomplice, she now demanded answers. Bursting through General Hux's chamber doors, she found him within seated with another officer, a tense game of Dejarik at play. Kali tried not to baulk at the sight of them in a state of relative undress, the rumpled dark sheets of Hux’s bed-linen in the background making her usually unflappable demeanour slip a moment. The young male officer’s face and chest flushed pink as he caught Kali’s surprised eyes as they tracked back to him from the rumpled bed, her gaze hardening as it moved to the General. Glaring at Hux, who remained completely at ease despite the obvious awkwardness, she finally spoke.

“So, this is how you’ve been spending your days Armitage?” Kali spluttered, marching closer to the game table.

“ I thought you’d be planning our next move, not corrupting your own officers. Have you no shame?”

Armitage Hux simply smirked and leaned back into his chair with an arrogant sigh. His silken black robe slipping back to expose his slim, pale chest and ebony sleeping trousers. If Kali had any lingering doubt of what he had been doing, she was certain of it now.

“Now, now Lady Kali. What you are implying? We are simply having a sporting game of Dejarik, aren’t we Lieutenant Picoult?”

The young officer of barely eighteen nodded, as his eyes focused on the floor. He had begun to tremble, the flush of embarrassment waning as he became deadly pale.  
“Yes sir” he replied quietly.

Kali scoffed with indignation, pulling at the back of Picoult’s chair she wrenched him away from the table at lightning speed. The young man yelped and shook as she leaned down close to his face, teeth bared in warning.  
“The game is over. So leave. Now” she growled. 

Picoult jumped to his feet, nodding rapidly as he shook. He gathered what small items of clothes he could and ran out of the room. 

Outside the chamber, Picoult collided with Mitaka, his gathered uniform and boots tumbling from his hands. 

“I’m sorry sir, I was….” He began, his face now flushed once more. Painfully aware of he must look. He did not finish as he bent down to gather his fallen clothing. The older officer’s eyes softened in sympathy at his comrade’s stricken face. Stooping to help him gather his belongings, he caught Picoult’s shame filled eyes.

“Don’t worry, in a year or two he’ll lose interest. He always does. No one ever lasts past 20. You just need to get through it. Trust me” Mitaka said honestly.  
The young man nodded, and a moment of understanding passed between them. Slapping Picoult slightly on the back, he continued his path to General Hux’s chamber.

Inside Kali was still scowling at Hux.  
“Careful Hux, you cannot allow your personal interests interfere or distract you from our goal.” She spat at him. Enraged that he dared indulge himself so blatantly at a time like this. His relaxed and arrogant pose stiffened as his face darkened.

“Never, m’lady. Tis but a trifle. An itch to be scratched. No bodily desire can distract me from what is rightfully mine. I want the First Order. Be in no doubt.” He replied seriously.

Leaning forward he reset the board game on the console in between them.

“Then why are we still waiting” she griped “I am bored of playing loyal servant to that….that odious child. Do you have any idea what it’s like to try stay impassive around him, train alongside him. Resist the urge to gut him while he sleeps….”

Hux raised a ginger eyebrow at her in response.

“Every minute of the day m’lady.”

Clearing his throat, he gestured to the chair opposite him as he sat up straighter.

“May I suggest a game of Dejarik? I find it helps to focus the mind at times like this. Such small and simple moves done in the right order lead to such satisfying resolutions. Patience, you see, can be the deciding factor in victory.” Looking pointedly at the Knight, he was relieved to see her anger abate somewhat, the cogs of her mind whirring as she took in his words.

“I was never one for games of strategy, however, I would be happy to learn…..if you have the time to teach me” Kali replied pointedly, pulling the other chair back towards the table and sitting opposite Hux. The General smirked as he cocked and eyebrow at her.

“Of course, I am at your disposal m’Lady. You need only ask”.

Mitaka cleared his throat suddenly behind them, drawing their attentions for a moment.

“My apologies for the interruption sir…..m’Lady. Supreme Leader Ren has asked if you can meet him in Battle room before breakfast to brief him on our progress”.

Hux exhaled loudly as he rolled his eyes. How he hated these progress reports. The monotony of having to discuss the same thing over and over with that ignorant brute, only for him to be constantly ignored and overruled at every turn.

“Very well Mitaka, tell him I will see him at 0800.” He replied boredly.

Mitaka nodded solemnly and headed back towards the door.

“How do you stand it Armitage?” Kali said suddenly, her eyes fixed once more on the game pieces, studying them intently.

“Stand what?” he replied, moving his first piece as his eyes flicked back up to hers.

“Bowing to him, pretending to be less than what you are?”  
He paused as he considered her question.

“Because I know one day, not too long from now, that brainless idiot is going to get what’s coming to him. Hopefully in the form of your blade through his back.”  
Kali’s mouth twisted into toothy smile.

“That is my hope too. But I abhor all this waiting.” She grumbled, moving her figure to counter Hux’s.

“I know, but we have to wait for the right opportunity” he sighed, moving his monster to smash Kali’s from the board.

“Why?” she asked almost petulantly, moving another figure to crush Hux’s main fighter.

“Because, when you kill a king, you don’t stab him in the dark. You kill him where all the court can watch him die” Hux replied as he moved his last figure, destroying the all of Kali’s remaining game pieces.

Kali’s eyes widened for a moment, but she quickly understood what he meant.  
Behind them Hux eyes settled on a shadow by the closing hydraulic door, for a moment he thought he saw Mitaka lingering by the entrance. Pushing the errant thought aside, he made his winning move and completed the game.

“Shall we try again” he asked simply resetting the board once more.

“Yes. I believe I am starting to catch on” Kali replied.

Outside the chamber door, Lieutenant Dopheld Mitaka mulled over what he had heard. Turning Hux and Kali’s words in his mind as he tried to confirm he had not misinterpreted anything. Convincing himself he had not misheard his General’s confirmation of a planned assassination, a veritable coup d’état in the making. The end of Kylo Ren’s rule of the First Order. Breathing deeply, he marched down the hallway toward his private but simple quarters intent on only one thing. Getting this information to Poe Dameron as fast as he could.  
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….  
Since becoming an official Resistance officer after the battle of Crait, there were only a few things Rey hated more than the required officer debriefings that happened every second day at 0730. Often these meeting happened prior to her much loved breakfast of re-hydrated eggs and bantha jerky. On the rare occasion breakfast would also include sweet buns and Arguez sausage if the stocks allowed it and Chewie hadn’t gotten to the sausages first. Her empty stomach and un-caffeinated body detested such interruptions to her food and sleep, alas in her new role as a reconnaissance officer, Captain Jakku was required to attend all meetings whilst on base.

Apart from her objections based on dietary restrictions, Rey’s hatred of these meetings often stemmed from the repetitive nature of their content. Planning and strategy was not her forte, she was a person of action, not diplomacy. The turgid nature of these briefings had only deteriorated as Leia’s condition had too. The remaining commanders were trying to continue business as usual, however it was obvious without clear leadership, their plans were almost rudderless. Without Leia’s guiding hand, they were uncertain of their next move. The alliances build with Naboo and the clans in the outer rim were starting to crack as the First Order began to advance again. They were going around in circles and today was no different. 

“So...” Poe began, the strain of the past week etched on his handsome face. Their usual avenues of discussion having been exhausted and now the cracks were beginning to show.  
“Does anyone have anything else to report?”

A few junior officers in the back of the conference room snickered loudly.  
“No Admiral Dameron, you grounded us all remember” a young and brash Captain muttered unhappily.

“Yeah….and you’ve not stopped bitching about since Median III so shut up or I’ll have on sanitation quicker than you can say ‘demoted’ Cannon. You all know I cannot send any of you back into the field until General Organa stabilizes.” Poe snapped back.

“What if she doesn’t? We all know she can’t hold out much longer” Cannon replied again darkly.

“Then you’ll be the first out on the death squad Captain Cannon, so keep asking” Poe growled, his composure slipping once more.

“Now if anyone else has anything else useful to say, now would be the time to say it”. 

Everyone shifted in their seats uncomfortably as his eyes swept across the room angrily. To her left, Rey saw Rose and Finn exchange a look, Rose nodding after a beat as Finn swallowed deeply. Rey watched them with interest, not privy to what their exchange meant. Rose had kept her distance from Rey since their last conversation about Kylo, her explanation had been weak at best. Rey hadn’t told Rose the full truth, that it had been the first time that Kylo had appeared through the Force to her. Rey had said grief had driven him to do it. Leia after all, was his mother. Rose had accepted this on the surface, but Rey knew she suspected something more was at play. And so, she had kept her distance, mistrust growing towards Rey despite her best intentions. Finn was unaware of this thankfully and Rose had not shared what she had seen.

Finn swallowed once more and he slowly raised his hand. Clearly his throat, he looked back at Rose for affirmation before turning back to Poe.  
“Yes Finn”.

“I have an idea Admiral Dameron” he said with a slight shake in his voice as he rose to his feet. Poe tried to hide the slight smirk of disbelief from his mouth as he nodded for Finn to continue.

“Look, we all know that over the last few months we’ve pushed the First Order further and further away, but despite all our gains, they always find a way to push us right back. Every fighter we shoot down, every Destroyer we blow up, it makes no difference. They just keep on coming”

Finn paused as he looked around the room, a few of the officers nodded agreement whilst others stared at him stoically.

“What if we found a way to choke them at their source. To guarantee that when we knock them down they never get back up again” He said gravelly, looking a Dameron.

“What do you suggest Finn?” Poe said carefully.

“We attack their gold mines, they can’t finance new ships with nothing.” Rose said simply, rising to stand beside Finn. Poe’s smirk slipped through with almost parental pride, his mirth was short lived as Vice Admiral Cho voiced her reservations. 

“While I admire your desperation to help, there has been no solid confirmation these mine even exist. They are simply a myth Lieutenant Tico.”  
“No they’re not” Rose exclaimed earnestly, her dark eyes fixed on Cho’s beseechingly “I’ve met people on Hays Minor who’ve seen it. A whole planet, glittering like fiery star dust. We can find it!”.

“To what end, I’m sure gold isn’t the only asset they hold at this point.” Cho replied haughtily.

Rose’s face twisted into a grimace as she fought to hide her frustration.

“But it’s the only one that matters, without gold they lose the Hutt syndicates, if they lose the Hutts they lose whole systems in the Outer Rim…..and if they lose those assets, Canto Blight is sure to follow.” Finn answered for her “We find those mines. We end this war.”

“How?” Poe asked seriously, all traces of humour gone from his handsome face “How can we find something that no one is certain even exists?”

Finn opened his mouth to speak again, but quickly shut it. Looking back at Rose she looked equally unsure. That was the main problem, how could they find one planet in a Galaxy of thousands. They would be dead before the found it.

Mulling it over in her mind, a thought struck Rey.  
“High Command” Rey added suddenly, not realizing she’d spoken aloud until all eyes in the Command room turned to her.

“What was that Captain Jakku?” Vice Admiral Cho said, looking at her bemusedly.

Rey’s eyes widen like a nerf in speeder lights as she gulped like a fish.

“High Command?” she repeated with trepidation. Poe watched her carefully waiting for her to continue. Breathing deeply, she tried her best to steady herself, pushing away her momentary embarrassment.

“If this planet is real and those mines exist, surely someone in the First Order High Command must know the coordinates. What if we staged an ambush and took one of them hostage?”

“That’s your plan, stage a suicide mission to the Finaliser in the vain hope of capturing an officer?” Captain Cannon laughed cruelly “Kylo Ren may consider sparing you because of his obsession with you, but the rest of us would not fare so well”.

Rey glared at him, her eyes narrowing as she contemplated launching him across the room or hanging him upside down until he passed out cold. Captain Cannon had out to get her from the start. A known hater of Force users, he had made it his mission to undermine here at every available opportunity.

“I didn’t say we attack the Finaliser you arrogant ass, did I” she spat back, the walls of the room shaking a little as she pushed her anger deeper. Small showers of dust and loose plaster fell to the floor as her fury caused cracks to form along the base walls. A few of the other officers looked around with concern as they watched her.

Rey knew within the Resistance there existed a growing few that viewed her as potential threat. Her power within the Force was known to everyone to be so strong it rivalled Kylo Ren’s and with this knowledge came suspicions. Ever since the battle at Crait countless holo's had been released by the First Order lambasting her power and ruthlessness, inciting terror and hatred in even some of her comrades. Rey had not been surprised that Kylo had twisted the truth and pointed the finger at her for Snoke’s death. Claiming she alone had slaughtered all but him in the Red Throne room. He was only trying to survive. But this lie and apparent feat of great power and skill, had led many to question her place in the Resistance. Rey did not need to search their minds to see this, it was written all over their faces. Thoughts that she too would rise to power at any cost. They needed her now, but once this war was over, there would be those who would call for her exile. A weapon that could not be controlled was a weapon not fit for purpose.

“Temper, temper Captain Jakku” Cannon smirked, delighted to have gotten under her skin.  
“No need to bring the whole place down. I was only asking.”

Rey could feel her temper rise once more, a cloud descending internally as a dark rage bubbled in her. His goading the last straw in a long line of frustrations. At least he was brave enough to show his mistrust in her.

Poe watched the scene unfolding in front of him, Rey’s shaking fist and flushed face startling him into action, and made a quick decision.  
“That’s it, Cannon get out. You’ve said enough” Poe said firmly, pointing at the doors.  
“But…I” began the officer, protesting his dismissal.

“Get out my sight Captain or I swear the next words out of my mouth will be permanent latrine duty!” Poe responded more forcefully, pointing again at the blast doors. 

Huffing loudly, Cannon glared at Rey a moment before rising to his feet and stalking out of the room.  
“As you wish Fleet Admiral Dameron” he growled, firing Rey one last bitter scowl.

Giving Poe a silent nod of thanks Reys darkened mood slowly started to lift. He responded with a small wink before turning to the business at hand.

“Perhaps, an ambush may work Rey, but as most know, we are woefully out gunned. An attack on the Finaliser is essentially a death warrant.”

“What if we set a trap? We find a target and we draw them out alone. I am sure you could figure out a way” Finn said earnestly.

The Admirals and Vice-Admirals seemed to murmur amongst themselves in discussion as Poe’s eyes narrowed in contemplation.  
“To draw them out, we’d need to have something they want.” Cho said gravely “And furthermore, we would need them to be reckless enough to risk leaving the Finaliser to get to it.”  
The Admiral’s brow knotted in concentration.  
“But who?” another officer queried.

A knot twisted in her gut as Rey struggled with the urge to say what she was thinking, because she knew exactly who would be headless enough to do it. And she knew exactly what he wanted. Steeling herself to act and potentially make herself a further figure of mistrust and quite possibly committed to the Brig, Rey started to speak. Just as she was forming the words in her mouth a young cadet rushed into the room, carrying a small communicator. All heads in the room turned to him in interest.

“Pardon the interruption, but Officer. M has made contact again. He said it’s urgent” the breathless soldier wheezed, clearly having run a considerable distance to deliver his message.

Beckoning with his finger, Poe called the boy over retrieve the communicator. Pausing a moment, Poe looked at the curious faces that surrounded him. Rey watched as he clutched the small metal box tighter, internally debating for a moment his next steps. Her own curiosity piqued by Poe’s sudden change in demeanour. Officer M was not a name known to her. She had rumours of a double agent deep within the First Orders ranks but had considered it nothing but idle talk until now. Judging by Poe’s face, he was keen to keep the mole’s existence close to his chest.

Standing to his feet, Poe looked at his officers once more.  
“I think it’s best if we end here for the moment. Return to your stations.” 

Without another word he turned and left, the other senior officers looking at each other in surprise. It was obvious, even they were not privy to the new leader’s sources.  
Clearing her throat after, Vice Admiral Susan Cho spoke first.  
“You heard the Fleet Admiral, everyone get back to work”  
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………......................................................................................

Hours later Poe had still not re-called the officers back into the Command centre, however Cho and many of the other Admirals had been noticeably absent for the remainder of the day cycle. Rey’s curiosity had grown by the hour, the atmosphere in the base swirling again as she felt something shift in the Force. Something big was going on.  
From her viewpoint in the Falcon, Rey watched as more and more delegates from Naboo and Mon Calamari arrived in the wake of the message Poe had received. Under the guise of completing minor engine repairs, she could surreptitiously monitor the comings and goings of all those who entered the base. She began to notice that as their guests disembarked, their expressions seemed to have drastically altered. They seemed…..hopeful again.  
Something important had been in that message. Something that could win a war.

Chewie chirruped loudly beside her many hours later, pulling her out of her reverie. Turning to face him she gave him a broad smile.

“I have not been slacking off! The thrusters are good as new”.

Chewie rolled his eyes as he let out an amused grunt as she pointed at the barely assembled repair.

“What they are! Trust me” she laughed as he ruffled her hair affectionately.

Growling again more softly, Chewie pointed at the large chronometer at the other end of the base.  
Rey laughed again, putting down her tools with a smile.  
“Yeah, I’m hungry too fuzzball. Let’s call it a day and grab some deep fried Gorg and Breadroot Patties”.  
Chewie grunted happily as they packed up and walked back in the direction of the canteen. 

The main medical bay of the base lay just to the West of the canteen hall. A lone white corridor that meandered off to the left of the main route through the base. As Chewie and Rey passed it in contented silence, a sudden change in atmosphere made Rey pause and look back down the long, white hallway. A whisper in her mind called and beckoned, stopping her in her tracks. Something pulsed through the Force as cold dark terror swirled around her.

“Leia” Rey whispered as she ran back in the direction of the medical bay. Chewie called after as she ran before lolloping down the hall too. Bursting through the doors of the ward, she was met by the concerned brown eyes of Poe Dameron. Leia motionless in the bacta tank she had been moved to, no better or worse than when she last saw her. The General’s chest rising up and down in synthetic breaths in time with the ventilator.

“Rey, what’s the matter? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Poe said softly.

Her face flushed as she realised nothing had happened. Leia was exactly as how she had left her this morning.

“I’m sorry” she mumbled, staring at the floor as Chewie burst in after her “I felt something and….I thought…never mind” she added sheepishly. Poe simply shrugged, none too fussed by her company.

Chewie grunted again and seeing Leia was okay, he turned and headed back towards the canteen. His rumbling stomach a more pressing issue.

“Don’t worry, the old girl’s fine. Still fighting strong” Poe said cheerily, but not convincing enough to assuage Rey’s worries. She stepped close to the bacta tank, watching her foster mother’s laboured breaths as the monitors beeped steadily. Pressing her hand to the tank she could feel Leia’s weak pulse through the Force, the last embers of great fire slowly cooling.

“It’s been 7 days Poe….7 days and nothing’s changed.” 

“I know, but we’ve just got to keep hoping it will” Poe said softly as he stood beside her. 

Slinging his arm around her narrow shoulders he pulled her into an awkward half hug. Even though the gesture was meant as a comforting act, his embrace made her a little uneasy. Poe had been doing this more and more, finding reasons to touch her unnecessarily. Not in an overtly sexual way, more in a declaration of his growing admiration of her. His obvious attraction to her getting more and more noticeable by the day.Clearing her throat, Rey stepped away from him uncomfortably.

“What if hope isn’t enough….How long do you really think we’re going to be able to hold it together if she goes Poe. Will our allies still stand with us?” Rey asked morosely, her eyes serious as she turned to face him. The Fleet Admiral sighed deeply in response, his brow furrowed as he crossed the short distance between them and Leia’s tank. Looking down at his leader, Rey saw a flicker of sorrow cross his features, brown eyes glassy for a moment as his fingers danced over the glass affectionately.

“I have known Princess Leia almost all of my life, when I’ve needed her she’s always been there. She taught me everything I know, took me under her wing and showed me what it was to be a good leader” His gaze was steely when he looked back at Rey.

“Do you want to know what the greatest lesson she ever taught me is Rey? A rebellion is more than one person. It is an idea, it is….a belief. And a belief does not die”.

Rey’s breath caught her throat at his candour, his usual easily going manner replaced by unyielding determination.

“After everything Leia has done for me, for all of us, I will not dishonour her legacy by giving up. Not when we have a way to win”.

It was the most animated she had seen her friend in days, she could feel his resolve strengthening, his fire growing in the Force as Leia’s dimmed. Rey’s suspicions that something had changed being all but confirmed.

“What was in that message Poe? Why did the others come and risk the journey? It wasn’t just to pay their respects” Rey said fiercely, standing beside Poe at Leia’s side.  
“No.” He replied simply “it wasn’t. But….I can’t tell you yet what’s going on. Not until everything is in place”.

“Poe..” Rey began to argue but Poe lifted a placating hand to stop her.

“Trust me, you’ll find out soon enough. But I need to secure my source before information gets out. We cannot be sure intelligence will not filter back to the First Order.”

Rey frowned but nodded in accession, pushing away the sudden compulsion to pull the information from Poe right there and then. She would have to wait.

“Fine, but this secret better be good” she grumbled, bumped her shoulder against his.

“It could win us the war. If we’re ready.” Poe answered plainly, and Rey’s mouth fell open in shock.

Unable to add anything further, Rey remained silent, mind turning over his words repeatedly until they lost their meaning. They stood watching Leia’s static form, each lost in their own thoughts until Poe was ushered away and Rey’s hunger got the better of her. 

Just as Rey began to exit the medical ward the same rushing swirl of cold, dark energy twisted around her, the feeling of soft fingers ghosting her shoulders. Turning on her heel she saw nothing behind her but Leia and hiss of machinery. Shaking the coldness from her, Rey stepped out the doors. Before they shut a whoosh of air hit her face, the whisper of save him reaching her ears.

Rey stood agape in the hallway, staring at the closed med bay doors. Her heart beating loudly like a drum and a dry sob wracked her chest. Trying to rationalise the sound of Leia’s voice that whispered to her again.

"Save Ben" it whispered. A mother’s plea.

“Are you okay Rey?” Finn’s warm voice called from the other end of the corridor, his dark eyes watching her with concern. Turning to face him Rey breathed deeply to try settle her unease.  
“I’m fine, just tired. Shall we go eat?” she said as cheerfully as she could manage, fully aware her appetite would be noticeable absent that evening. Finn’s concern did not leave his face, but he made no comments and gave her a watery smile in reply, offering his arm to walk the final few steps to the heaving food hall.  
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….........................................................................................

Hours later as Rey lay in her small narrow bunk, the incident outside Leia’s room still played upon her mind. Whatever Poe was keeping from her, it most certainly had something to do with Ben. Rey was sure of this, she could see no other reason Leia would risk her own life to communicate through the Force. Leia may have been fading, but she still had the strength to protect her child. She had to make sure Rey heard her.

The digital display on Rey’s chronometer toldd her it was many hours until lights up, but sleep eluded her. The silence of her small private quarters and chaos in her own head was not conducive to a pleasant night of dreaming. Restless and unable to turn her thoughts to a less troubling avenue, she gave up and decided to try something else.

Despite the monumental size of the Resistance base on Dalkar, it was not often that Rey was able to find time or space to be alone along the warren of tunnels that made up the rebel operations. Apart from her private sleep quarters, solitude was luxury not often afforded to her. It seemed ironic after so many years alone and longing for company on Jakku, a place to be alone had become such a necessity for her.

A few weeks after they had arrived on Dalkar, Rey had struggled to find places to train. To hone her developing Force skills away from prying eyes and suspicious whispers. It was Finn who had suggested the rocky outcrop less than ½ a mile from the main escape tunnels on the eastern wing of the base. Sheltered from the occasional driving rain that keep Dalkar green and humid and invisible to passing ships overhead, the small canyon served her well. Parts of the dense undergrowth had been cleared of gorse to allow easier movements through her forms, while the trunks of long dead trees acted as her opponents when Finn could not spar. In the height of the midday heat, the small stream than ran through the canyon cooled her and during her meditations, the smooth ancient stones that littered the sheltered plain acted as her anchor. It was here she felt most at peace among more green than she ever believed possible, in tune with the Force and all that surrounded her.

The moon filled the canyon tonight with soft silver light as her muscles slid through the familiar movements, synaptic memories shaping every swing and arch of her staff. The night was laden with heat and moisture, no breeze present to lift the humidity and yet Rey continued on. Each parry and thrust progressively getting quicker and more forceful as her frustrations and turmoil made her more aggressive in her strikes. Soon her body became unbearably hot as sweat began to bead from her forehead and back.

Tearing off her tunic without a second thought, she tossed it aside moodily, not caring one bit that she now stood in her breast band and sleep shorts. No one would see her at this time of night, her skin glistening in the moonlight as her exertions made her glow. Picking up her staff she began her pattern again with a ferocity that surprised even herself. The metal staff cracking deep grooves into the thick tree stumps either side of her. The fiery ache in her limbs not slowing her down, but instead driving her forward. Energy crackling around her like electricity as she used the Force to strengthen her resolve. Her mind flitting to Cannon’s disdainful sneer, the whispers against her on the base, Snoke’s twisted leering face, Malachai’s wide pained eyes as he fell dead at her feet, Han tumbling from the bridge, Leia’s burned out shuttle in the valley and finally to Ben. Her mind replaying his desperate and sad eyes when she’d tried to leave him in the Red Throne Room. The realisation that their visions could never come true. Growling loudly, she struck the trunks harder, bursting to drive the memories away. To release herself of the pain. Breathing heavily, her hair now sticking fast to her forehead, she made one last swooping arch. Twisting back on herself and driving her staff upwards in a devastating strike, she came face to face with a familiar presence.

Gasping loudly, Rey almost dropped her staff as she saw Kylo Ren’s shocked expression at the other end of her staff. The bond opening without warning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whos ready for some awkward sexual tension and frisson filled play fighting?


	5. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Ben grow closer as Poe reveals his plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of sexual tension and angst lie ahead! Unfortunately things remain frustratingly unresolved for the moment. Please let me know what you think, all feedback helps me improve as a writer :)

The bond was wide open again.

All around Rey, the Force swirled between the warm brightness of light and the desolate cold of the dark, finding balance in the space between.

Neither of Rey or Kylo said anything as the atmsphere stabilised around them, both wide eyed and breathless at the sudden reappearance of the other. 

Kylo blinked rapidly as he tried to collect himself, his own training sabre going slack in his grip as he took in the sight of her. Chest heaving and glistening in the glow of his training room lights. Her skin was flushed, damp with perspiration, hair asunder in haphazard arrangement and yet he had never seen her look so lovely. So free and wild as she looked at him with bewildered confusion. The large gash that marred her beautiful face was now nothing but a characterful flaw that added to her allure. The thin line highlighting the delicate curve of her high-check bones and bronze, sun-kissed skin. He couldn’t help but let his eyes wander from her face as he traced the small beads of moisture as they drew a line down her neck and between the hidden valley of her breasts. Her small breast band the only barrier to a much more sordid vision. His gaze drifted lower still to the tensed and toned planes of her stomach as she stood crouched with her weapon. He cataloged every tiny detail of unseen skin. Quietly appreciating just how delicate yet strong her body had become. Kylo gulped visibly as something stirred within him, his own skin starting to feel uncomfortably warm.

As his eyes returned to her face, Rey’s breath hitched a beat as she recognised the change in his gaze. That hungry look he’d given her a few times before replacing his surprise. The look she was really not prepared to deal with at this present second. How dare he leer at her like that! Her own indignation and discomfort not being helped by the fact that Kylo’s own torso stood bare in front of her. His broad, well defined chest and waist, pale and powerful in the nights shadow. A confused jolt of warmth ran down passed her stomach pulling her out of her distracted appraisals.

“I’d rather not do this right now” she said crossly, lowering her staff away from his face and fixing him an unhappy scowl.

“Yeah, me neither” Kylo muttered in reply, finally shaking himself free from his transfixed stare “But here we are…again.”

Sighing in resignation she set her staff down against a nearby boulder and turned to lean beside it, her arms crossed as she continued to look at Kylo hostilely. He stared at her, his head quirked to one side as he began to take in her surroundings. The moonlight throwing long shadows across the padded floor of his training room. Mirroring her actions, he rested his sabre on top of a nearby shelf in his room as he moved forward.

“Where are you? It looks like you’re outside” he asked curiously, stepping closer as he tried to focus on any other detail he could. 

“I am. And that’s all I’m telling you…. I don’t want you sending half the First Order down on my head right now” Rey retorted, the ghost of a smirk on her lips as Kylo’s own lip quirked a moment in response.

“Well if that was my intention, and it’s not, I’d have all the information I need to launch a scout team.” He said haughtily, lifting his chin to look down his nose at her.

“How so?” Rey replied, her eye brow rising as she challenged him.

“For one, I know wherever you are, is clearly warm, given your current state of undress…”  
“ I was training…does your lack of cowl automatically mean the same?” Rey began, rolling her eyes. 

Kylo let out an uncharacteristic snort of amusement at her comment, secretly elated at the effect his bare chest was having on her again. 

“You are outside though and clearly wherever you are is warm enough to allow that.” His hands ran over the ferns that sat on the fringes of her training area , his thoughts wandering on.

“Plus the vegetation…or what I can see of it is green and plentiful. A tropical planet maybe? With good arable land to sustain your growing army?” he guessed, his smirk deepening as he saw Rey’s glare hardening, clearly he was cutting too close to the bone.

“Is that a yes…?” Kylo mused again, stepping closer to her.

“I’m not telling you anything Ben.” She replied, her voice low and threatening.

“I’ll take that as a yes then” he grinned arrogantly as he leaned down closer to her. Getting a sick delight out of her discomfort, he could feel her irritation rolling across the miles between them.

“Even if it is, there are 100’s of planets in this Galaxy that fit that description. We’ll be long gone before you ever reach us” Rey whispered harshly.

“We’ll see.” He murmured, dark eyes flashing as they drifted to her full mouth as she pouted at him, jaw clenched in determination.  
“I will find you Rey.”

The distance between them seemed to grow smaller with every passing second, an inaudible hum of shared energy starting to surge as it had every time before. Kylo was now so close to Rey, he could see the band of green in her eyes that surrounded the pupil, the richness of it drawing him in further. The hazel shade was depth-less and inescapable as it reflected the silver moonlight. Rey did not say anything in return but instead stood staring up at him, her chest heaving with unexpressed frustration. Making no effort to move away from him despite her anger. Something primal and unnamed fixing her to the spot, lost in the intense chocolate brown of his eyes. An errant thought invading her consciousness, urging her to move even closer. Her eyes traced the small constellations of moles that littered his face like map to the slightly parted plush lips of his mouth. It was Kylo’s turn to see a change in her eyes as they stood locked in a stare, a desirous glint swirling in the beautiful hazel.

Licking his lips as a sudden nervousness overtook him, Kylo elected to step back. Turning to take in their surrounds once more ( mostly to diffuse the tension that had overtaken him) curiosity got the better of him again.

“Why are you training alone in the middle of the night?” he asked simply, turning back to her with a bemused smirk. Rey shrugged as she moved to pull herself on top of the boulder. Sitting cross-legged as she watched him wander around the hazy expanse of the bond that sat between her canyon and his own training room.

“I had a lot on my mind.” She replied.

“Couldn’t sleep?” his deep voice rumbled, already knowing the answer.

“Yeah me neither” he added, running his hands over the deep gouges in the bark her staff had made.

“It’s been a tough week. For everyone” Rey sighed, giving him a pointed look. When his gaze found hers again, all traces of good humour vanished, and she noticed the dark circles that framed his expressive eyes. It had clearly been several days since he had slept.

“Indeed it has” Kylo mumbled bleakly but added nothing more, his hand clenching into a fist as he rested it against the tree trunk. Facing away from her, his body tensed as a deep sighed made his shoulders hunch. Slipping off the rock and back into the gorse, Rey walked towards him.

“You know there’s still time Ben, she’s still holding on. Come back, I’ll find a way to help you” she said gently.

“No. What’s done is done Rey.” He mumbled bitterly again, staring fixedly at the cracked bark in front of him.

“I don’t believe that” she murmured softly in response.

“I have a path to walk and I made that choice a long time ago.” Kylo said more loudly, his temper starting to rise. Facing her , his brow was furrowed in a deep scowl, his mouth turned down in a sour grimace.

“You know the thing about paths Ben, eventually, even in the deepest, darkest places, you get the opportunity to diverge. You still have a chance. You can see her before she goes!” Rey replied with fierceness, desperate to make him see. Kylo shook his head in response, scoffing at her naivety.

“And you think those traitors and thieves you can friends would allow that? They would kill me on the spot, no questions asked.” He paused as a wave of regret filled him “And they would be right.”

“I would never let that happen Ben, not ever.” Rey replied honestly, stepping closer to him again.

“I wish I could believe you…but I can’t.” he replied with anguish, moving away from Rey. Aware her presence was weakening his resolve.

“I’ve been playing this part so long, I’m not sure how to be anything else anymore” He muttered more to himself than her “But it is my birth right to continue what my grandfather started.”

When he looked at her again, his face was a mask and devoid of emotions, eyes dead and without light.  
“And I will not fail him!”

Rey’s temper and frustrations at him grew , resenting him for his obstinance.

“Why are you clinging onto this idea that Vader’s destiny is the only option you have?” Rey shouted at him in exasperation.

“Because it’s the only thing I have left” Kylo spat back in gritted teeth, his mask slipping a breath.  
Smoothing his features once more, he chewed on his lip to steady the rage of emotions turning in his gut.

“I cannot deny the truth that is my family, I must continue the legacy as I was born to do, as all of us are destined. We are who our families make us”.

“If that is what you believe, then does that truly make me nothing Ben?” Rey said quietly, her voice bleak and ashamed. Kylo’s eyes narrowed in confusion at her words before the colour drained from his face in realisation.

“Never!” he whispered distraughtly, internally berating himself for ever making her believe that of herself.

“But I am nothing, I come from nothing, the child of filthy junk traders, you said it yourself. Am I destined to be that too, just as you are destined to be a new Vader?” she hissed lowly, tears starting to prick at her eyes. Running his hand through his unruly dark hair in embarrassment, Kylo winced, visibly ashamed at what he’s said.

“I never meant to come out that way, when I said those words, Rey I meant something else entirely. You…you…are…so much…more” he swallowed visibly as he struggled to find the words to express his feelings.

“Who our parents were and what our birth rights dictate, those aren’t the things that make us who we are. We are, who we choose to be” Rey said resentfully, wiping the tears from her eyes.

“I feel the conflict that rages within your soul Ben, I know this is not who you want to be.”

Kylo’s eyes darkened again as his anger quickly rose up once more. Taking a step forward he jerked his finger dangerously close to her face.  
“You know nothing.” His voice trembling as he spat back.

“Then tell me what it is you want Ben?” Rey retorted, squaring up to him despite her tears. His gaze blazed down at her as his anger bubbled just below the surface.

“The question is what do you want Rey? You're the one who shipped herself to me and then left me for dead” He replied bitterly, the obvious hurt and disappointment in his voice making her flush in shame. 

“I didn’t leave you for dead Ben, I was trying to save you! " Rey exclaimed.

"Save me!" Kylo exploded "How was leaving going to save me!"

"What do you think would have happened if I had stayed? We had just murdered Snoke and the entire Praetorian Guard! Neither one of us would have survived long once Hux found us.” Rey shouted back. 

“That’s not true and you know it. Together we could have been unstoppable! Nothing would have stood in our way” Kylo growled defensively.

“And what? Spend the rest of our lives cutting down anyone who tried stand against us?” Rey scoffed in response.

“Yes! I offered you the Galaxy Rey, I offered you everything and you threw it back in my face.” Kylo snarled at her, looming over her from his great height with fiery eyes.

“You offered me everything, except the lives of my friends” Rey replied sourly “I had to leave.”

“No you didn’t” Kylo muttered sullenly “You wanted to, there’s a difference.”

“It doesn’t matter what I wanted, it was never going to happen. You made that clear” Rey sighed defeatedly, looking at him with disdain “So I made a decision to save my friends.”

“How noble of you.” He shot back cynically.

“Oh my God’s you are insufferable sometimes” she growled, stalking off in the opposite direction, her hands clenching in and out of fists as hot angry tears rolled down her cheeks.

“Some things are more important than what we want Ben, then our own selfish pride.”

“I guess we’ll have to agree to disagree….” He muttered and began walking away from her to the far end of his training room. Clearly resolving to ignore her for the remainder of their time together. Rey had no choice but to follow him, grabbing her staff in the process as she called it to her with the Force.

Acting purely on instinct and a sudden rush of exasperated anger, she thrust at his back, throwing him momentarily off balance and onto the soft padded floor of his training room.

“Did you just hit me? ” He said rubbing his shoulders blades with slight amusement as he sat up from the floor.  
"You sneaky little scavenger"

To Rey’s great surprise she found the haunted darkness in Kylo’s eyes began to fade as he looked up at her, anger seeping away into stunned playfulness. If there had been any doubt that Ben Solo had survived Kylo Ren’s scourges against him, this was it. Pure light filtered from him at that moment, a lost boy returned.

“I was trying to knock some sense into you Benjamin” Rey said with half smiled “Not that I think it will be of any use.”

Shaking his head at her in disbelief, his sudden change in mood lightened further.

“Resorting to violence as a first response is not usually the Jedi way, but then again there’s nothing peaceful about you” he protested, unable to hide the spirited grin that slipped onto his face.

“I blame you Supreme Leader. You have a tendency of bringing out the worst in me” Rey replied archly, leaning onto her staff as she returned his teasing. Ben’s eyes widened for a split second as he began to realize, she was flirting with him. And he was not at all displeased about it in the least.

“Well in that case, I am glad to be of service” Ben chuckled, the deep timbre of it pulling at something deep within Rey. She realised it was probably the first time she had ever heard him laugh.

As he rose to feet, he called his training sabre to him with a flick of his wrist.  
“You don’t fight like a Jedi either, you know that” he said, swinging his sabre in a small figure of eight before crouching into a defensive form, fixing her a silent challenge as he stared.

“You fight more like a Sith, all passion and fire. It’s interesting” he mused, readjusting his stance as he stepped slightly to the side. Goading her into movement.

“Well that is your fault” Rey answered honestly, still leaning on her staff as she regarded him with interest.

“How so?” he replied with curiosity, shifting his stance as he watched her.

“You were my teacher, everything I know I learned from you. When you tried to get that map.When our minds clashed, you may have stolen my memories but me, I stole your skills” Rey answered with smug smile.

“We’ll see” Ben replied with a smirk as he suddenly lunged at her, making a half-hearted attempt to swipe at her legs. Rey easily blocked his strike before glaring at him.  
“Are you really being serious right now, you want to spar?” she exclaimed with less threatening tone than she had intended. 

Ben shrugged as his grin grew into a full, genuine smile. Another first for Rey as she noticed his slightly crooked teeth and the deep dimples that formed in his cheeks. It made him look almost boyish, and as reluctant as she was to admit, roguishly handsome. Something he clearly inherited from his father.

“You need the practise and I need the distraction, what else are we going to do?” Ben replied with intentionally flirtatious smirk. Rey scoffed but relented, swirling her staff in quick twist of her own with a cheeky grin. Unwilling to admit just how much the prospect delighted her.

“As you wish.” She smiled back at him, her face bright in anticipation. Ben grunted in satisfaction but said nothing further, crouching lower as he awaited her next move.

They circled each for a moment, trying to read the other’s movements and intentions through the bond. It would have been a fool’s errand to try dig deeper in each other’s mind, the tug of war not worth the physical strain. And so, it continued as a delicate game of cat and mouse, neither wanting to make the first move. Their eyes fixed again as they goaded and challenged their opponent to break the deadlock. His impatience getting the better of him, Kylo swung first. A sweeping blow which sailed over Rey’s head as she ducked and countered with swift strike towards his chest. Leaping out of the way just in time and skilfully blocking her follow up strike to his shoulder, his lip curled up in a half smile.

“Not bad scavenger, not bad” he muttered. 

Swinging his training sabre again, Ben crouched once more, keeping his large frame low and poised to strike. This time Rey acted first, surprising him with a sudden barrage of swings, one or two glancing their target as he parried as fast as he could. Ben hissed as one of her hits collided with his knee. Swinging aimlessly at her to create some small space between them, he hit nothing but air as she jumped well out of range. Using her staff as leverage, she landed a carefully placed kick right into the increasingly enraged Ben’s stomach. He coughed loudly as his bent over in breathlessness for a moment, twitching his fingers as he rashly sent a training mat across the room and straight toward her. His embarrassment growing. Rey side stepped it as she laughed at his humiliation.

“Had enough Ben?” she said with mock concern, prodding his wounded pride. 

Breathing deeply, a devilish glint returned to his eyes.

“Never” he grunted, rushing forward unleashing assault after assault, causing her to parry each furious swing with lightening quick reflexes. Ben smiled internally as he soon had her on the back foot, almost trapped against the great stone wall of the canyon. Bearing down on her and locking her staff in his, he was confident she would have to yield now she was trapped against his brute strength.

Rey was struck by how similar the situation had played out, so startling akin to the last time they had duelled in the freezing snow on Starkiller base. His raw strength pressing her down and momentarily disabling her. Hot breath hit her face as he grunted with effort, Ben’s face perilously close to her’s on the other side of their weapons. His eyes boring into hers as a proud smirk graced his full mouth, he was enjoying this more than he should. Rey realised he was so focused on keeping her in this position, to exhausting her so she would yield, he wasn’t even taking in his surroundings.

She smiled at him deviously as she shifted her weigh slightly, lowering herself just enough to slip her staff just behind Ben’s front leg and pulling it out from underneath him. As he lost his stability for a breath, his sabre shifted away from her face as he tried to re-balance. Reaching out with the Force she threw her discarded tunic across the valley and into his face, stunning him enough for her to twist away from him, strike his back and sweep low to slide his legs out from underneath him.

He landed in a groaning heap on the ground, pain exploding in his head as he hit the dirt hard. Before he could react and get back to his feet, Rey used her staff to flick his sabre away from him and placed the cold, metallic end of her weapon at the base of his throat. Tilting his face up towards her, she grinned at him in victory, watching as he scowled in the disgrace of his defeat. Chest heaving, he was annoyed at being bested once again.

“So far you’ve ended up on your back every time. Are you really sure you want to keep challenging me to duels Supreme Leader Ren? ” Rey laughed again, pushing her staff downward until it tracked the long scar she had given him. Her eyes drifted lower unconsciously as she followed the scar further down onto his chest, pausing at the rising and falling of his pectoral muscles as they rippled with each breath. Rey blushed as she realised what she was doing, dragging her eyes up rapidly to his face again.

To her immense surprise Ben winked at her suggestively as their eyes met, before grabbing the end of her staff firmly. Taking advantage of her fluster at being caught ogling him, he quickly turned the tables. Pulling her forward as he snatched her staff out of her hands, he hooked his long legs behind her and took her to the floor. Pouncing immediately to pin her beneath him in one smooth swoop.

“I’m sure” Ben grinned arrogantly, trapping her wrists in his large, broad hands. Rey struggled against him for a second, grunting in frustration as she could not budge him. She smiled despite her vocal protests, his victorious smile he was infectious. The boyish look his grin gave him was even more pronounced as his raven hair fell forward to frame his face attractively.

“Let go, you’ve won….this time” she laughed in grudging defeat.

“Not a chance, I think I like you better on your back. Where you belong” he answered mischievously without a second thought. It took a few seconds for his brain to realise exactly what he’d said, watching as Rey’s good-humoured expression slowly sank into a hard glare. Ben choked in shock as he realised his mistake, the colour draining from his face.

The playful atmosphere that had surrounded them dissipated in an instant as his words reached Rey’s ears. Ben's eyes widened in horror as he realised what he'd done, the double meaning of his foolish jibe making him flounder for anything else to say. This was made all the worse by the precarious position he found himself in, his bare chest pushed tightly against hers. Even with her breast band in place he could feel the obvious outline of her pert breast brushing up against his skin. A sensation he was suddenly finding very difficult to ignore. The position they lay in at that moment was less than innocent. Heat crept up from Ben’s chest to his face as his Adams apple bobbed up and down awkwardly.

Rey's anger simmered to the boil below him as she baulked at his words. Offended she could be reduced to such a dishonourable station by him so glibly. Growing up on the desolate deserts of Jakku she had regularly gone without portions to avoid such scandalous situations. There had been offers, many of them ever since she had begun to develop as a woman, propositions by travelling scavengers and pirates. Smarmy eyes calling to her across the marketplace, urging her to give up her virtue for an extra day’s fill of water and food. Rey had refused every single one no matter how hungry she felt. She would rather die than lie on her back willingly for anyone. A desert rat she may have been, but no one’s bought whore would she ever become.

Rey’s anger at that moment was also directed at herself, as an unexpected jolt of fever travelled down her body to rest at the space directly below Ben's closely pressed hips. Such anger burned at her enjoyment of his close proximity. She would not accept in her mind how his heavy and huge figure held so close to her, engulfing her entire form with his powerful shape, was making her body sing in such unspeakable ways. Rey would not be a slave to her own primeval impulses.

Rey glared at him with venom and began to squirm beneath Ben, trying to create any space that would help her slip away. She had to escape these new and complicated feelings. The heat that began to make her hips twitch of their own volition. Ben drove his legs down harder to force her knees apart in response, negating any effort she was making to buck him off her.

“Get off me. Now!” Rey snarled at him, her temper flaring.

“Stop moving Rey, I’m not trying to hurt you” Ben replied, leaning down try calm her, afraid if he let her go her fury would be unleashed. He already had one too many scars because of her vicious temper.

He understood his mistake a second too late as Rey launched her head forward with no warning and collided with his chin. The satisfying sound of bone crunching into bone cracked in the silent valley. Ben’s face flashing with pain as his teeth crashed down onto his lip. He tasted the metallic sheen of blood as he felt his skin tear.

It was Rey’s turn to look at him haughtily as he glowered at her, turning his head to spit as much blood from his mouth as possible. Thankfully it was only a small cut and would not bleed much. Tightening his grip on her wrists, his jaw clenched as he narrowed his eyes at her.  
“Was that really necessary” he growled “You almost knocked my teeth out. Why are you such a wild harpy sometimes?”

“It would have served you right. How dare you reduce me some common whore at your mercy Ben?" Rey sneered again, her rage not abating despite his lack of any real anger in return.  
Ben flushed in embarrassment. Why was it when it came to Rey he always managed to stick his foot in his mouth.

“You know that’s not what I meant at all, it was a stupid flippant comment. You know I don’t think of you like that” he said more evenly, hoping to sooth her wounded pride with his honesty “I’m sorry okay”.

"Apology not accepted! " Rey fumed, her temper calming a little at his genuine remorse. 

Kylo sighed heavily but said nothing further for a moment.

 

He considered her as she continued to glare up at him., feeling the waves of rage, frustration and borderline hatred for him roll from her mind and across the bond. Her eyes fiery and without remorse. Such flashes of darkness in such light filled person, it intrigued him endlessly. Despite himself and what he had previously been trying to achieve, Ben found himself staring at her. 

“See there it is again, that anger you can’t ever seem to control, do your friends know what hidden rage lives in you?”

He leaned in close once more to study her growing look of horror, wary of her sending another flying headbutt his way as she tried to squirm one last time against his restraints. To his great relief, her thoughts seemed elsewhere and she made no further attempts to hit him. Internally Rey felt a drop in her stomach at his observation. She did not like it when he could see her deepest fears like this. But it didn’t make him wrong, there was darkness that lay on the fringes of her mind. And at times, it was impossible to keep it at bay. 

Huffing loudly as she accepted there was no way of dislodging his iron grip from her wrists, she relaxed beneath him. Her anger fading as he looked at her steadily, any lingering malicious intent against him waning. She could see he hadn’t meant what he’d said and was truly repentant. There was no point in holding on to it this time. As she stopped struggling, his gaze became almost gentle. Relieved to see his ill spoken comment had been all but forgotten.

“We all have our secrets” she said simply, her voice even “Like you and your calligraphy” she added with small grin. Ben’s eyes widened to comedic proportions as he scoffed loudly.  
“I do not do calligraphy!” he denied vehemently.  
Rey chuckled as he became more and more flustered.  
“Don’t forget I’ve seen your mind Ben Solo, I know everything” she smiled jeeringly. 

Ben pouted and snorted in derision, but fully aware he could not refute her accusations, he sighed loudly in resignation instead.  
“Well maybe, at one time, I perhaps enjoyed it. But not now...” he flushed, unable to meet her eye.

“Okay sure” she replied sarcastically. Ben grunted again at her, an arched eyebrow silently demanding she drop it. She swallowed her giggle as she bit her lip, for once doing as she was asked.

Ben loomed above her silently, making no move to let go of her encircled wrists. He seemed utterly at ease at that second with her wedged below him. Rey couldn’t read his expression as he stared at her, his dark eyes boring into hers fixedly. Now they were no longer in midst of a playful power struggle or arguing with one another, Rey’s heartrate began to increase as her attention shifted to the feeling of his bare chest pressed to her. Warm and firm, his skin soft as silk. She resisted the urge to move against him, to feel the delicious friction of her skin ghosting over his. Staring up at him, she watched as his nostrils flared in and out as he was lost in concentration. Their faces separated by nothing but a few inches of air. If she wanted, all she had to do would be to lean forward and her lips would touch his in a single breath. 

“Are you going to release me, this game is getting tiresome now” Rey said suddenly, hoping to diffuse the building tension. 

All around them the Force seemed to push and pull them closer. Silently whispering in her mind to close the gap between them. Rey was sure Ben could feel it too, his jaw clenching slightly with nervousness as he cleared his throat.

“Maybe, maybe not. I haven’t decided if I have fully celebrated my victory yet” he replied smugly.

Rey rolled her eyes at, as she smirked as well.

"Let go of me" she sighed with mock disinterest.  
.  
"No" Ben shook his head stubbornly, smirk deepening. Rey felt something stirring again as he looked at her, that hunger building behind his eyes. She felt a blushing forming again as she became aware of just how much this particular situation was pleasing Ben.

“Then stop enjoying yourself so much at least” she countered knowingly.

Ben scoffed loudly before leaning down towards her.

“Enjoying myself? Don't flatter yourself scavenger” he answered in a low rumble, his deep voice reverberating into her chest. Making it flutter a little in response.

“Flatter myself, please! Then what’s that digging into my inner thigh right now. Surely not your training sabre” Rey replied wickedly, grin widening as Ben choked again.

His wide eyes drifted downwards to their joined bodies. Not aware of the situation their grappling had caused until that second. Sure enough he found himself growing hard in his sleep pants, his treacherous manhood rising into Rey’s soft, supple thigh. Ben’s whole face went red to the tips of his exposed ears as he gaped at her in embarrassment. His body tensed before he released her wrists abruptly, eyes averted. Unable to look at her in the face as he slowly scrabbled off her. Such was the intensity of his humiliation. 

Somewhere from the depths of Ben's lost memories an image replayed from his mind into hers. The ghost of a lonely young padawan rebuffed by the object of his affections. Children pointing and laughing at him as he dropped a lone lily he'd offered to a girl, humiliation rising. The dark haired girl ridiculing as cruelly as the other children, jeering him for his foolishness.

Sitting up, Rey felt suddenly sorry for him as he hunched over trying to hide the evidence in his black training pants. Terrified of her rejection and revulsion at his obvious lust for her. Scarred by the memories that flooded forward. He was beyond shame at this point. Unable to speak or move in her company. Humiliated over something he couldn’t fully control.

Shuffling over to face him once more, she angled her head to catch his eye.

“Hey, look at me” Rey whispered, reaching out to cup his face in her hands. Ben flinched,eyes flicking to hers for a tense second before falling again.

“Ben, look at me” she said again, this time more firmly. Finally Ben’s crushed and sad brown eyes settled on hers again.

“You nothing to be ashamed of” Rey smiled gently, running her thumb down the scar that bisected his check. Ben just shrugged in response but leaned into her hand regardless.

“Don’t be afraid, I feel it too” she whispered honestly, watching as his eyes brightened as he understood what she was implying. 

That this thing between them; he was not alone in feeling what he did. Her own cheeks pinking, Rey pryed up the bond wider, so he could sense the unexpected thrum of need emanating from the pit of her stomach. Fire rolling down her spine until it settled in valley between her thighs.

“Rey?” he began, tilting forward in disbelieving awe , moving to rest on his knees in front of her. Searching her open face for confirmation of what he never thought possible. Leaning his face down closer and closer, eyes fixed on her parting lips. Steeling himself to take the plunge that had been building towards.

In the blink of an eye, the canyon was empty, all traces of Ben gone like dust in the wind. The bond snapping shut on them without warning. And Rey sat alone in the lonely silence of peaceful plain, the hollowness she felt inside too hard to bare.

“Goodbye Ben” she mumbled to herself, bitterly disappointed at the unresolved questions that remained unanswered.

Out of the corner of her eyes something suddenly caught her attention, a strange shadowed figured, basked in blue light staring at her. Turning quickly, she found nothing but the silver hued outlines of trees in the moonlight. Rising to her feet she searched the shadows again, eyes scanning every curve of the small valley.  
Still nothing of note could be found.

Just as she resolved to return to the base, a shiver ran up her spine as that ghostly feeling of a small, feminine hand on her back caught her breath as it had earlier.  
“Leia” Rey whispered.

(Save him. Bring him home.)

The disembodied voice pleaded through the Force.

(Save Ben)

In the next beat, Leia’s presence was gone. Leaving Rey breathless and alone once more. 

****

The muted lights of his training room greeted Kylo as the moonlit valley disappeared with Rey. Exhaling harshly in disappointment, he slapped his hands down on the training mat as hard as he could. The sound reverberating around the room like a cannon blast. He ached to touch her again, to feel her soft skin under his finger tips. He'd been so close and yet too slow to take advantage of what the Force had offered him. 

The throbbing of his manhood again his thin cotton night pants adding further aggregation to his mood. What was he to do with this new insistent problem? Take himself in hand lIke an indisciplined child? Kylo contemplated it for a moment before chastising himself for even considering it. He was the Supreme ruler of great swaths of the galaxy , not some shameless hormonal padawan anymore . 

Collapsing forward in defeat and frustration, he winced as his sensitive, semi hard cock was crushed under his full weight. He forced himself to press harder into the cold mat, willing the blood to rush elsewhere. Relishing the sharp pain the crush of his body caused him.

Resting his forehead down on the mat, he closed his eyes as he exhaled again sharply. His frustrations and discomfort giving you way to a sudden wave of exhaustion. He was so tired of this war.

The doors behind Kylo hissed open, disturbing his solitude in an instant. The deep rumble of Eshu's unmistakable chuckle and Morana's breathy laugh jerking him back to reality. Their light hearted exchange died in an instant as they spied his large frame sprawled out on the mats, his dark eyes guarded as he watched their approach. 

Eshu recovered first, shaking his panicked shock from his ebony face. He bowed sheepishly, honey eyes downcast as he surreptitiously nudged Morana to follow suit. Jolting into action, her red locks fell forward as she bowed too. Her bright blue eyes blinked rapidly as she willed her racing thoughts into a neutral indifference.

"Forgive us for the intrusion Master Ren, we did not know the training room was occupied" Eshu said respectfully, his eyes still fixed upon the floor.

"It's fine Eshu, I am finished my forms for the night. The floor is yours" Kylo said boredly, calling his discarded night shirt to his hand as he rose to his feet reluctantly.

It hung loosely in his hand, carefully held in front of the visible bulge in his pants. Thankfully consealing the offending erection from his Knights curious gazes.That was an embarrassment he could do without.

"Thank you sir" Eshu replied graciously, silently thankful their leader had not questioned why they were training so late at night. Distracted too much by his own thoughts and unable to focus on theirs.

Kylo waved his hand half heartedly in response as wandered out of the training room. Keen to be free of any potentially awkward stares.

"Train hard, I will see you all tomorrow for group forms" he muttered sternly, finally exiting the double durasteel door.

Morana let out the tense breath that she was holding, pale skin flushed in response to the anxiety in her chest.

"Do you think he saw our minds?" She whispered once she was sure Kylo was out of earshot.

"No " Eshu responded, his eyes fixed on the door, a troubled expression gracing his dark features.

"I think his mind was elsewhere."

Morana gulped visibly, not feeling in any way comfortable with this cloak and dagger situation. Her loyalty still torn by indecision.

"Let's begin then, assume attack position one. " She mumbled reluctantly, raising her training sabre towards Eshu's without another word.

...,.........

Rey had barely begun to sleep when insistent knocking on her door awoke her violently. It was just after sun up judging by the time on her clock. Such early summons were rare even at times like this. Her sleep deprived thoughts turned immediately to the worst as the rapping of knuckles on her door continued. Feeling through the Force, she felt Leia's weak pulse thrumming on. Relief washed over her instantly, her curiosity rising instead. Swinging her legs over the side of her bunk she yanked open the door to meet the eyes of a very chirpy Lieutenant Connix.

""I'm giving you 10 seconds to explain yourself or im going back to bed." Rey smirked jadedly, eyes squinting in reaction to the overly bright corridor lights.

"Well good morning to you too sunshine. I trust you were not asleep by lights out last night" Connix laughed in reply to Reys crumpled and haphazard appearance.

"And...? It's 4:30am, no one looks good" Rey smirked again.

"Touche. I would love to leave you to your dreaming , but the Fleet Admiral wants to talk to you. " 

Rey's smile disappeared as she sighed again.

" Right now, it's the middle of the night....sort of' she groused.

"Yep, sorry. Orders are orders" Connix replied with another gleeful smile. Rey rolled her eyes but grinned despite her dissatisfaction.

"Fine, give 2minutes" 

Less than 10 minutes later, Rey found herself ushered in Poe's personal study. Her eyes widening as she saw Rose and Finn waiting inside already, deep in conversation with Poe.

The Fleet Admirals smile broadened as he caught sight of her.

"Good morning Rey, rough night?" Finn grinned as he motioned to her disheveled hair. Her usual three buns completely lopsided and hanging off her head.

"Not as rough as yours obviously. Did you go to Chewies barber again?" Rey smirked pointing at his patchy attempt at facial hair as she took a seat besides them.

"Hey, I'm trying something new" her friend grumbled, pouting as he turned back to Rose and found her biting her lip to stop from laughing.  
"Rose! You said you liked it"

"I do, I do " she choked before bursting into laughter as she caught Rey's mischievous grin. Finn scoffed in indignation.

'You guys suck" he scowled , crossing his arms across his chest in protest.

Chuckling heartily, Poe shook his head.

"Alright girls, let's leave the kid alone. His pubescent beard is very dignifed." Poe teased. Finn shot him a look of disgust, muttering under his breath. Glaring at all three of them he snorted loudly. Visibly unimpressed by their teasing.

Clearing his throat, Poe let the last of his humour fade out as a more pensive look overtook him.

"So I guess you're all wondering why I called you here so early?"

"Just a little " Rose griped, rubbing at her tired eyes. Rey noticed then she was still in her light flannel sleep clothes. The soft blue material rustling as she moved.

"I'm sorry for disturbing your sleep, but what we're about to talk about....it's classified."

Poe looked between them slowly, trying to impress upon them the seriousness of the situation.

"The Resistance needs you all for a covert mission, one that requires as much discretion as possible. No one save the other Admirals are aware of what we are about to discuss"

Rey leaned forward in interest, her exhaustion forgotten. Finn and Rose looked at one another for a second before turning their full attention back to Poe.

"Three day cycles from now, Finn and Rose will be sent off planet to Canto Blight to start phase one." Poe began.

"Canto Blight? Alone? Are you crazy? Everyone in the Galaxy knows who we are!" Finn interrupted, panic clear in his voice.

"Maybe, but that's what you're doing" Poe said firmly.

"Why?" Finn spluttered.

"Because, we want people to see you." Poe answered.

Finn's eyes narrowed in confusion.  
"I don't understand, if this is a secret mission, why do we need people connected to the First Order seeing us?" Rose said, her suspicion rising as she spoke.

"Because, in order for phase 2 to work, the First Order will need to have confirmed sightings".

Poe paused as Rey, Finn and Rose mulled over his words.

"On Canto Blight you will make contact with Soci Blyn the sl..."

"The slave trader" Finn finished bitterly, his teeth gritting in his mouth.  
"You know him" Rose asked.  
"Yes I know him, every stormtrooper does" Finn replied darkly " He makes money supplying kids to the First Order for the programme."

Rey gasped as she looked at Poe in disgust, not understanding why Poe was ordering Finn to meet such a despicable life form. A criminal who was directly responsible for his years of abuse in the First Order.  
"You really want me....to meet this guy, someone you know has caused me a lifetime of pain and loneliness?" Finn growled, shaking a little with repressed rage as he glared at Poe unhappily. " I wouldn't ask unless if it was my only option. I need people I trust" Poe replied with clear remorse, embarrassed to being asking this of his close friend. "What then?" Finn sighed harshly, reluctantly conceding to hear him out.  
"Then, you bribe him with all the credits we give you, so he'll spill the location of the next pick up for the First Order" Poe answered.  
"You mean his next round of stolen children! " Finn spat back.  
"Yes." Poe nodded gravely.

" Why not stick a blaster to his head, get the location and blast his brains out?" Rose said fiercely out of the blue.

"That would be preferable believe me. But we need him to pass on information to the First Order that the Resistance is planning to intercept their next delivery. We need them to know we are getting ready to pounce ,so they believe it when the rumour begin about Rey."

Rey's eyebrows shot up into her hairline as she heard her name falling from Poe's mouth.  
"The day before the drop off, I will send some of our unknown officers to Maz's Cantina . Once there, they will start to get loose lipped, to talk about the Last Jedi getting ready to liberate some newly acquired assets in transit."

Poe paused for effect.  
" The First Order has ears everywhere, it won't be long until it gets back to Ren"

"Why would they believe that?" Rey replied, blinking rapidly in confusion.

"Because that's exactly what you'll do" Poe replied plainly.

Rey and Finn exchanged looks of trepidation, convinced Poe had truly lost his mind.

"And why exactly will I be doing something so flagrantly stupid?" Rey scoffed loudly.

"You said so yourself yesterday, to get those coordinates we would need to draw the First Order out. To find the gold we would need to bait them, to find something they wanted more than anything else . Most importantly, we had to find someone so reckless they would risk anything to get it. Kylo Ren wants you Rey." Poe said evenly.

Her blood ran cold her in veins as she processed his words, unable to form a coherent response as he continued.

" As you all know, the Resistance has a mole in the First Order, an officer that now wants to defect completely. He is gathering all the data we will need to find their source of their gold. In the chaos that Kylo will cause in his pursuit of you, we will smuggle Officer M out. We will win this war" Poe said with resolute determination.

Rey sat gaping at him, not quite fully understanding what was going on. Finn and Rose sat staring at Poe feeling equally flumoxed. Something about the situation didn't fully sit right.  
There was something else at play that Rey couldn't quite put her finger on. It lead to only to one conclusion.

"There's something your not telling us, something that was in that message earlier. Why else would you risk so much?" Rey said in suspicion, leaning forward again. Searching her friends eyes for any sign of what lay below.

Poe remained silent, his lips pursed in displeasure. 

"That's restricted information" he said tightly, usually warm brown eyes flashing in warning. Urging her to drop the matter immediately.

"Please Poe. Please just tell us what's going on" Rey pleaded.

"No Rey, leave it be" Poe replied harshly.

Reys eyes narrowed, an internal debating raging inside before her growing concern got the better of her. Hating herself as she outstretched her hand and used the force to dip deep into his mind. An act she swore she'd never do after the trauma he'd faced with Kylo Ren. Rose and Finn gasped in shock, disgusted she would this to her friend.

Poe's eyes widened in terror as she tore through his memories until she reached the one he was trying to hide. Sweat beginning to pool at his brow as he struggled. Rey's heart dropping as the worst was confirmed. Releasing him immediately she gasped.

"Hux has turned the Knights of Ren! They're planning a coup...and to kill Kylo Ren"

Poes eyes narrowed further in rage at her betrayal of his trust, his breathing erratic after her invasion.

"Yes he has" Poe growled angrily, his fists clenching at his sides as he tried to calm his anger.  
"And I can't believe you just did that, do not go scouring in my mind Rey. I mean it".

Rose and Finn averted their eyes, unsure how to reaction in the current situation.

"I'm sorry Poe, I shouldn't have gone so far" Rey said regretfully, her eyes downcast in remorse.

The silence in the room was deafening at that second. 

"But I had a right to know" Rey added after a moment, her eyes set in determination as she met Poe's gaze again.  
"You are using me as bait, chancing my life in the hope they attack Kylo first. I have a right to know why my life is being put at risk."

"Sometimes ignorance is bliss. I didn't want to add any distractions to your mission"

"Ignorance is bliss? You know they've been waiting, biding their time until they can get us both, Kylo and me. Two birds with one stone! And I'm supposed to be thankful?" Rey shot back angrily.

"We'll blow them apart before they ever reach you. I'll have every gun in the armada pointed at that spot" Poe answered fiercely "If luck will have it, we'll get Hux too".

"He'll be so absorbed by his plans coming to fruition, the chance to actually remove Ren from the picture finally, Hux won't see us coming. It's our best chance to end the Order" Poe added with fire in his eyes.

Rey's heart sank further as she heard this, any hope that Ben would survive this situation was quickly dissipating . There had been a small chance Ben would sense the Knight's betrayal of him before they reached the rendezvous point, to anticipate their attack before they could strike. Maybe just maybe, his focus on her could be shifted long enough for him to see the danger that surrounded him. But there was no way he could stop a cannon blast aimed straight at his head.  
She had to find a way to help him. Ben would not die because of her.

Schooling her features into a neutral expression, conscious Rose was watching her with interest,Rey took a deep breath.

"Fine. But I'm not happy about this" she retorted.

Poe shrugged in response, not in the mood to humour her further. Turning back to Finn and Rose, his irritated expression softened.

"I want you both to meet me in the Command centre at 1200 today to discuss transport and entry routes. We may be aiming to make your presence known, but we don't want to broadcast it like a holo across the Galaxy like the last time in Canto Blight!" he chuckled.

Rey's mind began to whirr behind her mask of mild chagrin, realising with a start what Leia had been trying to tell her for the last 24 hours. 

"May I be excused now Fleet Admiral Dameron. I have a few hours left before my duties " Rey said tetchily, relieved to see Poe wave her off. Clearly happy to be rid of her bad mood at that time.

*****  
The lights of the medbay were set low as Rey crossed the cold concrete floor to look at Leia. Smiling sadly as she looked over the General's frail form, so tiny in the large bacta tank, she knew it would not be long. All the cuts that had blemished her skin were gone, but yet her condition remained the same. Her heart too weak to recover from that last great stress. Placing her hand against the glass, Rey closed her eyes and atuned herself to Leia through the Force. The soft blue of Leia's form, vibrating at the edge of Rey's mind.

"I heard you. I understand now" she whispered softly, tears pricking at the edge of her eyes. Conscious that she didn't have much time.

"I will bring him home. I promise you." Rey continued "None of this will be in vain."

Her ears began to pick up the slowing of Leia's heart rate on the monitor as she spoke. Tears starting to fall fully now.

"The light still lives in him, I've seen it. No one is ever truly gone and neither is Ben. I know that now".

The monitor started to beep loudly as Leia's heart rate began to drop a dangerous level. Rey smiled as her tears soaked her face, the feeling of a warm hand on her back comforting her as she said goodbye.

"I will bring him home,so you can go if you need to." Rey gulped as a sob wracked her chest. The blue of Leia's force signature faded slowly to pure white, the long uninterrruped blare of the flat lining monitor confirming all she needed to know.

Smiling despite the abject grief she felt, Rey whispered softly close to Leia's ear.

"Tell Han I said hello, the Falcon is in good hands".

With that the warm hand at her back lifted and the room filled momentarily with a soft and peaceful energy. When Rey opened her eyes again the medbay was cold and empty, the monitor droning on with uninterrupted noise. Pressing a kiss to the bacta tank, Rey turned and exited the medbay solemnly as doctors rushed passed her to the tank. Her tears falling without end. She would keep her promise even if it killed her too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Leia, it will not be the last we see of her as Ben will get a chance to have some closure. The action will start to ramp up at the end of the next chapter. Please leave Kudos if you like :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leia tries to impart so much needed advice to her son, Kylo deals with grief as he and Rey grow closer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the plot thickens! A lot of this is heavy, heavy stuff as Kylo says goodbye but some major Reylo moments happen in the mid to end of the chapter! Thank you to all that commented, gave me kudos and bookmarked the story. It means a lot. Please let me know your thoughts on this installment :)

Dreams had never been kind to Kylo Ren ever since he’d been a boy. Even before his fall to the dark side, demons and fiery figures plagued his young mind. Under Supreme Leader Snoke’s reign of terror, Kylo had become accustomed to nightmares on the rare occasions he was allowed sleep. The exhaustion of his grueling training knocking him out cold, subjecting him to the feverish, twisted and tormenting dreams his master would shape for him. It was in these nightmares the darkness would whisper, to taunt him and tear his mind asunder until all that remained was the rage that intensified his power. Snoke had controlled every aspect of his life in both sleeping and waking states. Manipulating his apprentices' psyche until he was nothing but a blunt tool, a puppet dancing on a choking string. 

Even now, with his master dead and his mind free for the first time in his adult life, the darkness still haunted Kylo’s sleep. His soul tortured by recurring dreams of guilt fueled memories. A constant reminder of what he had done to those he loved most, to re-live again his biggest mistake. 

He dream of Han. 

It always began the same, that distinct smell of burnt durasteel and Tie Fighter fuel filling his nostrils. His emotions thrashing inside him like raging sea as father and son stood on that narrow bridge, floating over a great chasm of endless lights. The room tinged in red as the light of a dying star cast long shadows over him and his father. Breathing short and heavy as their eyes locked in battle, Han pleading for his sons return. 

Most times the brutal and tragic dream played out as it had on Star Killer base, his crackling, bleeding sabre driving straight through his father's chest. Hans eyes widening in pain and shock before slipping into acceptance, his last act in life to reach out to Ben in love and forgiveness. Kylo would watch with dejection as his body fell down and out of sight into the great endless pit below. Taking Ben's broken heart with him. 

At other times the scene would flip and Kylo would watch through his father's eyes as he made that final, brutal strike. The fall to the desolate hole that lay beyond the bridge, unending and terrifying. Stretching on and on until the fear jerked Ben out of sleep. 

 

Tonight, unlike the many nights that had passed before, the dream was different. 

Kylo hesitated this time, his sabre shaking in his grip as his found he could not strike. Han reached out and seized the sabre from him before he could act, shoving Ben to edge of the narrow bridge. His father held him out to the precipice of the pit bekow by the collar of his jacket, keeping him from falling with the lightest of touches. 

Han smiled suddenly, laughing at a joke only he knew the punchline to. 

"Sorry Ben, it's for your own good" he sighed in resignation before letting go of his jacket, Kylo losing balance and tumbling down off the bridge with a yell. The lights of the chasm rushing passing him as the wind screamed in his ear. 

The descent to his apparent death ended swiftly as he landed with an audible thud, his fall cushioned by a bed of softness at his back. Looking up from where he lay in utter befuddlement, Kylo found himself staring up an endless star lit sky, framed on either side by long stalks of wheat and barley. 

Quickly rising to his feet, Kylo looked around at break neck speed, seeing nothing but rolling fields of grain and grassland on either side of him. In the distance he could just about make out a lone oak tree at the top of grassy knoll, the telltale shimmer of a star lit lake just on the other side. The scene seemed oddly familiar too him and in some recess of his mind a memory stoked into light. 

Not a single soul could be seen for miles and miles around him. He was utterly alone and stranded in some twisted, mundane dream 

Breathing rapidly, his chest struggling to catch up to his increased heartbeat, Kylo spluttered loudly. 

"Well this is just great!" throwing his hands up in the air and kicking out at the plants like a petulant child. The stalks rustled and snapped at the force of his kick, tumbling to the ground below. 

" Oh for goodness' sake Ben stop being so melodramatic" his mother's chastising voice said behind him. Turning quickly on his heal, he came face to face with his mother's teasing smile. His eyes widening with shock. For this was no manifestation of his mind. This was no memory or dream. 

Leia Organa’s presence glowed bright blue across the great expanse of Galaxy that separated mother and son, her thrumming light through the Force connecting them. 

"Mother?" He gasped with uncharacteristic enthusiasm, surprising himself by leaning down and pulling her to his chest. Clinging to her like a lost child seeking salvation. 

For the first time in almost a decade he felt his mother's small, delicate frame embrace his. Rubbing his back in reassurance like she'd done since he was a tiny boy. Kylo suddenly found that he was shaking, a sob threatening to exit his throat. The warmth of her presence in the Force, surrounding him like a comforting blanket. Relief washing over him as he simply held his mother without any thought of what it meant for the future. Just for in this moment he wanted to forget their mistakes, to forget the past and forget the war. 

Pulling back slightly, an affectionate smile graced Leia's face as she looked up him. 

"Let me take a look at you, my how you've grown Ben. Such a dashing young man you have become" 

Her hand moving from his back to stroke his cheek, taking in the face of her prodigal son after so much time apart. Sadness flashing in her eyes as she recognized Han in his features. The full mouth and furrowed brow being nothing but Solo genes. 

Ben said nothing in reply, his cheeks pinking at her words. It surprised him endlessly that he felt no animosity or hatred from her after all he had done. What he'd taken from her. That despite everything, despite all the pain he'd continuously inflicted upon her, she still loved him unconditionally. His mother instead radiated nothing by happiness, content just to have him close to her even just in the realm of dreams. In the end, all mothers loved their sons blindly and without judgement. And for this, he felt the deepest shame of all. Because he would never deserve it. 

"I can see now why she likes you, those puppy dog eyes sure do come in handy" Leia laughed softly. 

"You get them from my side of the family for the record. Amongst other things obviously " she added after a beat, arching her eyebrow for comedic affect. A huff of unexpected laughter left Ben's chest before he tried to school his features into a more neutral state. 

This was definitely not his usual reaction to his mother's presence and yet, he found he did not care. 

“Your admiration of leggy brunettes, well that is definitely your father’s doing” Leia added with a knowing smile. 

" I have no idea what you're taking about" Kylo replied with a barely concealed smirk. 

"Sure." Leia shot back sarcastically, finally releasing Ben to cross her arms across her chest "I may be old, but I'm not blind. I know you care for her" 

Ben's face flushed a deeper pink, avoiding Leia's eyes. Instead focusing on the dusty mud that rose as he kicked at the dirt . Turning and pulling at the ears of wheat stalks, he let the grains slowly tumble down from his hands as he sighed deeply. 

"And what of it, it doesn't change anything. We're still at war with each other." 

"Ben it changes everything" Leia replied behind him. 

"How? What we feel changes nothing. You are my mother and I still fight against you, Luke cared for me and yet he tried to kill me, I loved my father and I still..." 

The rest of Ben's words died in his throat as he had to gulp back the well of grief that rose up in him. Behind him Leia let out long, unsteady breath as her own pain throbbed around them. But instead of rage or resentment, he felt his mother's hand rest on his shoulder as she tried to turn him back towards her. 

"I know, but I also know what Snoke did to you my boy, the things he made you do. We've all done awful things to survive Ben . Your father would have understood that." She replied honestly. 

"How can you even look at me after what I've done?" he asked his eyes downcast in disgrace, a tear tumbling down his cheek. Placing her hand once more at his cheek, she tried to catch his gaze. 

"Because someone has to my darling, you are my son” she whispered affectionately . 

Her eyes darkened as regret filled her face. 

“Because if I had been paying attention, if I had been watching you when I had the chance to change things, none of this would have happened. " she added fiercely 

"You were only a child and I let Snoke twist you until you couldn't find another way to be. I didn’t question why you turned on Luke. I should have...." She added quietly. 

Ben sighed again deeply, more tears falling as his jaw clenched deeply. 

"Can you ever find a way to forgive me?" Ben asked bleakly. Running her hand over his soft dark hair, Leia nodded solemnly. 

"Only if you can find a way to forgive me." 

Ben did not reply, his tear stained face twisted in anguish, instead leaning down to rest his forehead against his mothers. It was all the answer he needed to give. 

“Come home Ben, let go of all this hate. You know it will destroy you in the end. You still have a chance" Leia pleaded. 

 

Ben shook his head in reply, exhaling shakily as another tear threatened to fall. Moving away from her, his shoulders slumped as stared off towards the lake side. 

"I can't mother, I've tried. " 

 

Leia walked up beside him, linking her arm in his. Staring up at him beseechingly, his mother spoke evenly. 

 

"What is it we have always told you my son. Do or do not...." 

 

" There is no try" Ben answered solemnly, flicking his eyes over to Leia’s again before dropping them to the dirt again. Grasping at the sleeves of her son’s dark tunic she tried again to make him see. 

 

"You know what happened to your grandfather Ben, he fought who he truly was, let his pain and hate consume him. Lost so many years in conflict..." 

Ben’s eyes hardened again in response, pulling away from her. A sudden rush of anger filling him 

" My Grandfather was a god amongst men. If he willed something, it became reality. There had never been anyone his equal and I have done one better than he. I am beholden to no one.." He spat back bitterly. 

"Except her....” Leia interrupted, fixing him a look of stern conviction “You are beholden to her, to repay the faith she has in you. Rey is the only one left that sees who you really are." 

Ben’s eyes grew fiery, his buried frustration rising again. 

"She sees who she wants to see, Ben Solo is dead." He said through gritted teeth, glaring at his mother. 

"No he's not. He’s right here, hiding under all that anger and self-hatred you call Kylo Ren” 

Leia replied simply, her gaze never wavering despite Ben’s attempts at intimidation. 

“You've spent your entire adulthood trying to be someone else, but you can't deny who you are no matter how deep you bury it. You try so hard to be a new a Vader, but you don’t even know who he was. Not really.” 

Leia’s eyes bored into Ben’s as her voice grew even more steely. 

“Even after everything he had done, my father as died Anakin Skywalker.” 

Her son’s anger subsided a little as a wounded look graced his features for a second, her words hitting home. Approaching her son once more, Leia reached up and stroked his cheek affectionately. 

“Anakin let go of his hate and he died saving what he loved. Who he loved " 

"He made a mistake" Ben muttered half-heartedly, not truly believing his own words. 

Leia chuckled a little at his petulance, her hand reaching up to ruffle his hair in response. 

"No, he learned from his mistakes. As you must." 

"Be that as it may, what you're suggesting is impossible." Ben sighed sorely, his brow furrowed as he stared off into the distance. 

"And why not?" Leia countered, moving her head to try catch his gaze with her eyes. 

Ben arched an eyebrow at her as he finally relented to her searching eyes, scoffing as he replied with disdain. 

"Don’t be so naïve. You really think that the Resistance will just let me live after everything I have done. My chances are less than zero" 

"Never ask the odds kid, it ruins the fun" Han muttered sardonically, stepping out from behind him to stand lazilyby his sons' side. 

Ben's lip trembled as his father's weathered craggy face gave him a half smile. Unable to hide the happiness at seeing Han Solo just one last time. His elation quickly died as guilt gripped his breaking heart. Ben fought against the urge to rush forward to and hug him, the pain at seeing his father after what he’d done proved too much. He did at least try to find the words to voice the remorse he felt. 

“Han Solo, I don’t know if I can ever express....If I can ever say....” Ben’s breath choking the words in his throat as regret filled him. Han’s eyes gave nothing away as he reached and placed a hand on his son’s shoulder. 

“I know Ben. I know... It’s okay” Han said gently, squeezing his shoulder affectionately. Ben chewed on his lip as he swallowed the well of sadness that tried to push itself out into the open. 

He nodded after a moment, his breath still shaky as he looked between his mother and father. Knowing nothing else was needed to be said. What was done, was done. 

Han’s brown eyes sparkled after a breath as an unexpected look of humour shined through. Lifting up Ben’s chin slightly to admire the sabre scar Rey had given him, his father chuckled. 

"Now that is a beauty. What did I always tell you kid, never piss off a woman that's smarter than you!” Looking at Leia warmly, a wry smile on his face, he chuckled once more. 

“More often not you'll end up bleeding" 

“Oh do stop Han that was one time!” Leia retorted, slapping him lightly on the arm, smiling despite herself. 

“Yeah and I still have the scar to prove it” he groused, pointing at his chin with a smirk. 

Leia rolled her eyes at him but said nothing more. Han’s grin widened as he relished the rare victory. 

The corners of Ben’s lips quirked up as they shared look. The last of his father's good-natured banter slowly faded as his face became more serious in look. 

“Listen kid we don’t have much time, the nights almost at an end and we gotta go.” Han sighed unenthusiastically. 

“Promise me, no promise us, you won’t give up. Not yet. It’s never too late” Leia added earnestly “Please know we’ll always be with you” 

“Always kid, no matter what” Han added without hesitation, obvious affection in his eyes. The atmosphere suddenly seemed charged between them as an unspoken secret pulled towards the surface, taking root in Ben’s mind. 

“What are you talking about?” Ben asked with trepidation, looking between with growing confusion, an alarm bell ringing somewhere deep in his subconscious. Walking the small distance to him, Leia smiled at him sadly, reaching up to gently pull his dark head closer to her. Kissing his son’s forehead his mother's eyes were forlorn as she met his dark gaze. 

“You’ll understand soon my darling” she replied sadly, a sense of resolution in her words. 

Ben stared at her in growing bewilderment, not at all liking the finality in her words or gaze. 

Just then a light caught his attention far in the distance, disturbing the dark calm of the star lit field. Its sudden brightness drawing his gaze towards the lone oak tree by the lake side. A flickering yellow flame against the navy shadows of the starry night. Leia and Han were gone when Ben looked back towards them. Nothing but the gentle swaying of the wheat met his anxious gaze. Disappointment filled him as he found himself alone once more. Lost in the midst of an endless crop of barley and wheat. 

His despondency was quickly forgotten as a low hum interrupted the endless silence. A sound thrumming around him and moving from the lake side. It was a sound that called to him, urging him on. The hum and the wind whispered to him through the golden wheat that brushed against his hand, coaxing him on towards the growing light by the shore. With bated breath, he paused in thought at this strange occurrence before moving his reluctant body forward through the rows of heavy stalks. 

A solitary figure became clearer by the oak tree as he closed the distance swiftly. The stranger’s cloaked body illuminated from below as if in firelight, the warm orange and yellow glow dancing off a featureless brown hood. They did not stir or shift as he approached, deadly still as they watched the fire. 

The inky sky above Kylo began to change as he drew closer, breaking into a colourful dawn of pinks and reds. The first of two sun's rising on the horizon, sending streaks of light high into the sky. Kylo could hear the low hum that had drawn him here, seeming to grow louder and rise in pitch the closer he got to the fire. 

The stranger did not turn as he approached, their face obscured by the heavy hood and clothes by the dark brown cloak. For a moment Kylo’s heart stilled in terror, convinced that the disguised figure was his uncle come back to haunt him as he had promised. His momentary panic passed in an instant as he saw the motionless form was too short to be Luke Skywalker. 

Ben became aware his new companion had either not noticed his presence or was steadfast ignoring him, their unseen eyes set upon a dying fire in front of them. Ben could just about make out the charred remnants of a large wooden structure, the last flames that flickered casting long shadows over the early dawn lit wheat. 

The snapping of a twig underfoot finally drew the strangers startled gaze to Ben as he crossed the final few feet. The low hum that had called him here ceased in an instant and was replaced by the sound of thumping hearts and stuttered gasps at seeing the other. All at once Ben was dragged from his dream into the very real early dawn on a planet millions of miles from his bed. 

Rey's red rimmed hazel eyes met his as they stared out blankly from within the dark hood. Ben let out a relieved breath as a smile began to break through. However, Rey's blank stare did not soften or change, her nostrils flaring as her bottom lip trembled. Clearly upset and unable hide her pain. Ben’s elation at seeing her quickly died as she lifted her hood to reveal her dark chestnut hair, twisted into a style he had only seen once or twice in his life. A braid his own mother had worn, his chest contracting at the symbol of deepest respect and love. The sign of loss and death. Panic rising in Ben at the sight of Rey's Alderaan mourning braid. A braid that only meant one thing. 

Her jaw clenched and unclenched as she fought back the urge sob, eyes glassy but never breaking contact with his increasingly forlorn eyes. 

"No, it can't be." He whispered desperately, his eyes drifting to the smoldering debris as reality began to hit him. 

" It can't be, I would have felt it" he added, tears starting to prick at his eyes. 

Rey didn't say anything, her face crumpled as she felt his anguish rising . 

Stepping forward she raised her arm up towards him, her right hand clenched around something tightly. Rey’s sorrowful gaze fixed on Ben's confused and increasingly dismayed face as she tried not to cry. He exhaled loudly as his eyes flicked to her extended hand suspiciously, building grief making his breath quicken rapidly. 

Gently taking one of his hand in hers, Rey placed Leia's large purple and silver ring in his palm. Closing his longer fingers over it with a sense of finality. 

"I'm sorry Ben." She said quietly. 

His body now shaking with shock and disbelief, he opened his fingers to look at the silver trinket. The warm metal so tiny in palm. Looking over at the charred wood, the structure finally made sense. 

He hissed audibly as Rey's memory of the funeral pyre suddenly invaded his mind as the ring shifted in his grasp. The desolate flashback hit him like a punch to the gut. Watching as the fire burst into life under the pyre as Poe Dameron lit it, sparks catching the kindling and roaring up to his mother's shrouded body. His heart dropping into the pit of his stomach, acid rising in his throat as he saw the flames rise quickly, engulfing her almost in an instant. Kylo closed his eyes as the image became too much, begging for the vision to leave him, the pain of his grief blindsiding him. 

Turning back to Rey he saw her jaw was clenched tight as silent, fat tears rolled down her face. Her eyes desolate and hard as she watched him. 

Kylos lips began to tremble as the gravity of the situation hit him. Collapsing to his knees, Kylo let out a uneven and jagged breath. His mother's ring tumbling out of his grasp into the soft grass below. His tears immediately obscured his vision as an uncontrollable sob wracked his chest. 

"I didn't even get to say goodbye. I should have...I should have reached out" he gulped between his heavy tear-filled breaths. Clutching at his hair, his big hands covered his face as he sobbed into the crook of his arms, body shaking uncontrollably. 

Rey's face softened as his genuine anguish pulled apart her already breaking heart. Stirred into action, she placed her hands either side of Kylo’s downcast head, pulling apart his arms as she stepped in towards his forlorn figure. He instinctively buried his face into the rough fabric of her robe, fingers wrapping in the dark brown cloth as he sobbed. Rey’s fingers laced into his curls as she rested her forehead against the crown of his head. Her eyes closing before pressing a chaste kiss to his dark hair. 

“Shush....there was nothing you could have done. She felt no pain” Rey whispered to him gently, softly running her fingers through his hair. 

Ben’s heavy sobs soaked the material of her funeral robe as she pulled him closer. His arms moving to wrap around her slender body, desperate to feel anything but the aching throb of torment his mother's death had dealt him. Rey kissed his head once more, this time more forcefully so he would feel it. Trying desperately to console him in some small way. Because she knew how this felt, that flaying sting of being left all alone in the world. The feeling of being left behind. 

Ben’s huge hands gripped her robe, his knuckles tensing and relaxing as he took solace in her warmth. His head shifted to rest just above her breast bone, breathing in deeply as his desolate sobs calmed into shorter hiccups. Ben’s hands finally relaxed, holding her more firmly as his hysteria lifted. Taking comfort in her arms, he was suddenly intoxicated by the feeling of her so close to him once more. The rich aroma of her skin filling his sense, dulling the pain this wretched morning had brought him. 

Rey sensed the abrupt change in him, both of their breathes stuttering as something suddenly swelled within them. Electric and all-consuming like the fire that had seared the pyre beside them. 

Ben slowly lifted his head from Rey’s chest as he caught her glassy, guarded gaze. The swell that had filled him slowly washed away, any relief he had felt draining down into the ground. Grief returning like punch to his gut. 

Rey still held him close as he watched her, those great big brown eyes staring up at her as they brimmed with bitter tears. The once dark pools of depthless rage a warm shade of amber in the firelight, displaying the vulnerability that lay below. Rey couldn't look away, couldn't help but let her breath stutter again at the beauty of them at that moment. He held her gaze steadily, his lips trembling as he fought the desolation that bubbled below his surface. Mirroring her own grief. 

Rey recognized the pain he felt, as visceral as the ache the thrummed in her own chest. It was almost unbearable. She began to release him again slowly, to give herself a moment to breathe. Overwhelmed by the abject sorrow he was projecting across the cosmos, but even more by the increase of her heartbeat as he gazed at her. Beyond the anguish he felt, something altogether more dangerous was brewing inside him. The liquid brown of his gentle eyes showing her everything he was desperate to deny. The sheer want to be with her, to be free of the loneliness that surrounded him. The twisting intensity of it clouding her senses. 

Rey couldn't take it, her already overwrought emotions stirred and unstable with him so vulnerable in front of her. 

Panic flashed across his features as he felt her move away from him. Clutching at her robe, his knuckles white as tried to stop her, pleading with wounded desperation. 

"Please." He whispered forlornly, begging her to stay with him. 

"Please don't go, not yet". 

Rey stopped, her conscience urging her to pause despite her panic. She made no attempt to move away from him, instead watching him with sorrow and understanding. 

Rising suddenly to his feet, Kylos eyes shined with grief and terror as he walked closer to her. Drunk with desperation and regret ,he surprised her by placing his hands either side of her face, pressing his forehead against hers. Tear still streaming down his cheeks. 

"Stay. Please" he whispered again. 

Her emotions swirling wildly at the sudden feeling of him so close, his warm hands comforting and deliciously firm on her cheeks. The surging of the force around them once more, spun her dangerously off her axis and in a direction, she was unable to control. Driven by a need to comfort Kylo, to break the growing tension and cure the ache in her chest, Rey acted on impulse. Giving into the feelings she had suppressed for so long. Tilting her head upward in Kylo's hands, Rey's mouth met his for the briefest of seconds. Eyes closed, she pulled back a second before leaning into his mouth again more firmly. His soft lips parting in surprise as her full mouth pressed into his. So taken aback, Ben visibly stiffened, unable to respond in anyway at that moment. His hands fell from her face as he froze in shock. Pulling back awkwardly, Rey's cheeks pinked at her own folly, taking his less than eager reaction as a rebuff to her kiss. Her first ever kiss with any man. Kylo’s eyes were wide in amazement as she looked him, his body frozen and chest heaving. 

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that" she muttered dejectedly her eyes downcast. Her gut sinking with rejection. 

 

Rey's began to step away from him again, her face flushing in embarrassment, desperate to create some space between them to soothe her humiliation. Blinking rapidly Kylo seemed to snap out of his reverie, his own disbelief subsiding. Reaching out he grasped her wrist and pulled her back in towards him. Gripping her hip with left hand to hold her close, he slowly releases her wrist, rising his palm to settle on her cheek once more. His thumb traced the line of her scar as he looked deep into her wide, unsure eyes. Wiping away the last of her tears as he smiled softly. 

"Don't be sorry" he said quietly, his voice low and gentle, gaze drifting to her parted lips before flicking back to her hazel eyes. 

"I liked it" he whispered shyly. Rey's face brightened in response, letting out a relieved sigh. Realizing he too had never been kissed before. 

Running his thumb over her cheek, eyes still fixed on hers, Ben licked his lips. The subtle taste of her mouth still present on his skin, lips burning from their contact. It was a sensation he wanted to repeat, a new and beautiful gift he wanted to bestow and receive again. Gulping visibly, he closed his eyes and leaned down. 

Without another word he captured her lips in his. It took Rey a moment to respond, the tenderness of his kiss taking her by surprise. She had never thought him capable of such gentleness, his mouth impossibly soft as it caressed hers tentatively. Rey met his kiss eagerly, leaning in to reciprocate as much as she could muster. The whole world disappeared into nothing as Ben felt her kissing him back earnestly, pushing forward to meet his mouth. Her fingers clutched at his tunic, finding purchase on his chest as she pressed up from her feet until she was almost on her tip of her toes. Arching up to close the distance. 

Ben’s initial nervousness evaporated as something deeper took over. Her body trembled against his fingers, the sensation of her warm, generous mouth against his sending sparks down his spine. Acting purely on instinct, he took her bottom lip between his drawing her in closer as the kiss deepened. Her hands slid up his chest to wrap in his dark curls as her mouth parted to let a breathy sigh of satisfaction out against his increasing plush mouth. Despite his distinct lack of experience in this field, Ben took the invitation willingly. Testing the edge of her lips with his tongue. Rey responded almost immediately, meeting his tongue with her own as she pulled his head down closer still. Consuming every touch he was ready to give her. Ben responded greedily, both his hands nestling in her thick mass of chestnut hair. Carefully arranged braids fraying and loosing under his prying hands.

Rey had always read about kisses like this in the stories Rose had tried to force upon her. Long romance epics of dark princes and brave lady of the court that flowed from her friends well used datapad. Florid stories of kisses by lakeshores with wind whipping around the embracing couples, filled with forbidden love and lust in times of war. These farcically intense tales of woe and lust beyond any sense of human reality. Kisses like that didn't exist in real life, people did not fall for their enemy like that and yet, now clinging onto the man she was supposed to hate, Rey was beginning to believe it was possible. Her experience in terms of what constituted a great kiss was embarrassingly non-existent. However she was certain no first or second kiss would ever compare to this. Her hunger expanding by the nanosecond. The longer her mouth moved against his, the more she tasted of him, the more she knew kisses like the silly romance stories Rose had read her, really could happen. 

The force bond contracted and expanded around them as the dived deeper and deeper into each other. Darkness and light slipping into grey. Grief momentarily forgotten as a warmth grew between them, a fire bursting into life from the embers of their bond. 

Ben had never dared to hope that he would have a chance like this. To actually kiss and be kissed by Rey. To feel wanted like this. Pure light rushing in to him, filling every dark crevice of his soul as he kissed Rey harder. If he had ever doubted it, now he knew with clear certainty. He was starting to love her. 

Ben’s mind lay open in front of her suddenly as their kiss reached a fever pitch, memories flashing into her mind. Showing her everything that lay below. The abject sorrow he felt now, the rejection he’d felt waking up alone in the throne room, the regret he felt for what he’d done on Starkiller base. Rey could see and feel everything, the very essence of his pain and torment. But she also felt a growing warmth at the fringes of his consciousness, a light flickering and expanding into a rising sun upon a distant horizon. Anger bleeding into desire, loneliness drifting into longing, destruction into rebirth. Rey could see, she could feel the light he hid so deeply, alive and well. Delight in finding the flames of Ben Solo burning on, caused her to kiss him even more passionately. Her tongue dancing against his in flurry of heady want. 

Ben’s mind opened further at her provocation and he grunted audibly, pulling her flush against his body. His obvious growing excitement making him bite seductively at her lower lip, his grip bruising but deliciously firm. Rey nipped him back, smiling against his mouth. Her breath ragged as she pulled away before crashing into him again. 

With new avenue’s opened in his consciousness Rey ventured down the warren of pathways, sensations exploding in every nerve of her body as Ben pressed into her mind too. Turning through her memories and feelings like a sandstorm on the dunes of Jakku. There was a small part of her that feared his intrusions, flamed at the illicit thoughts that he would find there, but another large part of her that rejoiced in their connection. Bared entirely to the other. Equal in their discoveries. 

As she followed Ben’s thought’s down a twisted path she felt a coldness grow around her. A presence quietly watching through another weaker connection. This cold tendril in his mind grew stronger the more she ventured down this path, icy fear pressing into her chest. The unseen watchful spectre, bursting forth to loom down at her. Yellow eyes glaring into her and sharp teeth bared. Rey knew instantly who she was. Kali had seen her in Ben’s mind. Kali was watching. 

Rey abruptly pushed Ben away, stumbling away from him in muted shock. Her chest heaving and eyes were wild as she turned away from him. Ben’s face follow her for an inch or two, arms still outstretched as he watched her step away from his embrace. His confusion swiftly shifted into hurt and immediately embarrassment filled him as he mistook her stoicism for regret and rejection. That she had seen something in him that had driven her away. Rey said nothing to dispute this, still reeling in shock from what she had seen. Dropping his hands to his sides Ben scowled deeply, his eyes drifting to the rising suns by the lake. Actively avoiding Rey’s haunted and confused expression. 

Snapping out of her shock, she realized in her grief and stupidity, she had forgotten what an opportunity his appearance before her now, was in light of what Poe was planning in the coming days. Rey had to warn him of the treachery that surrounded him. Taking in his humiliated and dejected stance she saw what her initial reaction had done. Moving toward him sheepishly, she reached her hand up to his face in an attempt to get him to look at her again. Ben’s jaw twitched in agitation but he made no move to shrug her off. His eyes though, did not oblige her despite her best efforts. 

"Ben, it’s not what you think.” Rey said earnestly. Still his jaw twitched as he remained silently seething, his eyes looking away towards the still lakeside. Dark fear and rage rolling off his shoulders an automatic reaction to her apparent rejection.

“Look at me” she urged, her other hand reaching up to turn his chin down towards her. Finally relenting, Ben’s gaze was dark and filled with hurt as he glared down at her. 

“It’s not what you think, I swear. I saw something in your mind....something dark that didn’t belong. It wasn't you.” Rey said bleakly. Ben’s stare was blank as he looked back, her words not thawing his icy anger at her at that second. 

“Ben, I swear. Nothing inside you can scare me, this was something else. I swear it on my life.” 

His eyes’s softened a little at her words, the honesty in them making him doubt his convictions slightly. Seeing no other way to make him believe her, Rey pulled his mouth to hers again. 

Kissing him as earnestly as she could, Rey urged him back towards the light. He responded after moment, grudgingly giving into her efforts to soften his anger. The kiss though was short lived as Rey pulled back after a moment. Rey looked up at him with concern, his face open and ready to listen finally. 

“Listen to me, you are in grave danger. You need to get out, now!” she said desperately. 

“Get out? And go where” Ben spluttered. 

“Anywhere but the First Order.....” Rey answered shakily. 

“Rey...” Kylo began wearily, softly removing her hands from his face, convinced she was trying to get him to defect once more. 

“No....Ben...listen to me....there’s something you don’t know. Something I need to tell you.” Rey began again, her eyes wide, urging him to take her seriously. Ben looked at her suspiciously, but did not interrupt despite his distrust.

“The Resistance has received intelligence from a mole in the First Order. Hux has tur.....” Rey said rapidly, her speech petering out as she found herself alone amongst the swaying ears of barley. Kylo’s dark looming presence gone. Rey’s anger rose up from nowhere, the cruelty of the Force snapping him away before she could warn him enraging her. 

“Dammit” she roared, reaching out with the Force and hurling the great charred remnants of the funeral pyre out into the golden field of grain. The heavy thud of the wood against the hard, dusty earth echoed through the early morning air. Crushing more and more stalks as it rolled onwards for a turn or two, the scorched wood disappearing into the thick growth. Rey howled in frustration which swiftly slid into anguish as she collapsed onto her knees, tears pricked at her eyes once more. She had to find a way to save him. 

“Rey....” Finn’s worried voice called to her on the other side of the destroyed pyre. 

“Rey are you alright?” 

Wiping her eyes and rising quickly to her feet, Rey nodded solemnly. Desperate to avoid any probing questions. 

“Yeah...I’m okay” she sniffed audibly. Finn looked at her with trepidation but said nothing further for a moment. 

“If you’re sure” he mumbled uncertainly. Staring off towards the early morning dawn as it bled into a beautiful day, Finn was momentarily lost in thought. 

The sound of Rey clearing her throat pulled him back to the task at hand. 

“Why are you up so early? You’re never up before 8 if you can help it” Rey teased as he looked back at her. Attempting humour despite the desolation she felt inside. Finn’s lip quirked up in a smile as he rolled his eyes. 

“What! I enjoy my sleep, it’s not a crime. What if I just felt like an early morning stroll” he chuckled. Rey flashed him a brief smile.  
“Why are you really here?” she asked more seriously. Finn’s smile faltered as he sighed deeply. 

“Poe is sending us out today, and I guess, I just wanted to say goodbye. Just in case.” 

Rey’s heart stopped as she heard this, clearly Poe did not want any delays on his plan even in the circumstances. She had thought she had maybe a day or two of grace to think of a strategy to help Ben in light of Leia’s funeral, she had been mistaken. 

“Wow, I thought everything had been pushed back” Rey said solemnly. 

“Yeah well, there’s no rest for the wicked. Plus that slimeball of a slaver is only on Canto Blight for another day cycle. So it’s now or never I guess” Finn said sourly. 

“I guess so” Rey said quietly “Be careful my friend” 

Stepping forward she pulled Finn into a deep hug, tightly squeezing him as she tried not to let her fear show. He did not need her doubts at this moment in time. 

“Please come back, promise me.” she whispered as she hugged him harder. Finn chuckled softly. 

“I promise sweetheart” he answered earnestly. Finally letting him go, Finn nodded as he gave her a friendly smile. 

“See you on the other side, hopefully he doesn’t give us the wrong location” Finn smiled to himself as he walked back towards the base entrance a few clicks away.

It was then an idea hit Rey. An idea so simple, yet so obvious she was angry at herself for not seeing it before. 

“Finn wait” she called out, half running over to meet him where the wheat field dissipated into grassland by the lakeside. Finn looked back at her curiously. 

“You once told me, that if needed your help, I could ask you for anything. No questions asked.” Rey began, her eyes searching her friends dark gaze with nervous conviction. 

“Finn, I need your help. No questions asked” she added, her eyes desperate.  
“I need your help to lie to Poe”. 

Finn gasped as he looked at her with shock, unsure of how to answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What will Finn reply? Please send me Kudos and comments if you like this one as it encourages me to keep writing this long ass story :)


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